The Ninka Interview

Ah, that minefield of stupidity that Mary is going to have to live down for the rest of her royal life. This was an hours-long interview that Mary gave during the engagement, and which has become an irresistible buffet, a veritable cornucopia of quotations that show just how important Mary tried to sound, how elegant she attempted to be, and how miserably she failed. What comes through, especially now, years after her babbling idiocy, is a self-importance dripping in naivete. That would be HER naivete in thinking that we, the thinking part of her audience, would believe this shit, and in not realizing that she set herself up for lots and lots of delicious, chocolate-covered failure.

Without further ado, I give you a few chosen snippets. Unplug the phone. Turn your Blackberry to vibrate. Grab a glass of wine, a cup of tea, or a bottle of water, and enjoy.

I knew that work should not fill my entire life.
Well, let’s not kid anyone here, Mary darling, because your job record shows that CLEARLY work has never filled your entire life. According to your own website, kronprinsparret.dk, after university, you worked for:
DDB Needham in Melbourne
MOJO Partners, also in Melbourne.
Rapp Collins Worldwide of Edinburgh (3 month contract) while traveling after death of Henrietta.
Returned to Australia in the beginning of 1999
Young and Rubicam, in Sydney.
Love
Belle Property.
In the first half of 2002, taught English at a Business English School in Paris
Later in 2002 moved to Denmark and was employed by Microsoft Business Solutions/Navision

So that’s more than a half dozen jobs in just as many years? Yes, Mary, I agree that work definitely didn’t fill your entire life.


It would have been horrible, if I had been in the spotlight and next day just had to be myself again.
I’m sure, Mary, I mean, once you got a taste of being in the papers for doing nothing other than Frederik, it would have been tough to get back to your commoner life. Good thing it didn’t happen, isn’t it?


The more you are in the spotlight, the more difficult it is withdraw from it.
As you now well know and I am sure you’ll put up with a LOT just to stay in the spotlight.



I have always hated to be photographed.
Isn’t this the grand quote from Mary given my recent post about her addiction to photo shoots? I have to say that this and the “experienced experience” quote from Starmakers are my top two favorites. Here's another pic. I have a billion like it, of Mary looking for the camera.


For the first three and a half month after we had met, after Queen Ingrid died, we didn't see each other.
Could that be because Frederik was still dating someone else? According to all the timelines out there – except the ones of fangirls who could never accept Their Mary was the Other Woman – Frederik was still dating Bettina Odum when he met Mary, and for a few months after he met her. So yeah, boys and girls, Mary was the Other Woman, which nobody can deny.



I have never been interested in being in the front pages of the media. I'm not a "public" kind of person.
Is that why you posed with a z-list celebrity, Sarah O’Hare? Is that why you appeared on an advert for your company? Liar, liar, mismatched pants on fire!!!


I didn't move to Denmark until August 2002, when I moved into an apartment at Langelinie in September and started a new job. I had met one of Frederik's friends, who was a business man in Denmark. He introduced me to Navision. They needed some employees, it was a big company, English speaking, and I could use my experience in project management. Naturally my professional background was the most important asset for them. But they offered me the kind of flexibility I wanted.
Yep, the flexibility to not go to work whenever you wanted!!! Which was often, as people in Navision have said you were barely there. That’s called dedication, my lass, not to work, but to snaring Frederik!!! And the apartment, cost what, 5K a month? With weekly orchid deliveries. Did you set up those deliveries, Mary? And just billed Freddy? How lovely.
How important you are pretending to be, Mary, if your experience was really needed, why were you never at work? Accept it, sweetie, this was a Booty Call job set up by your boyfriend’s friend to keep him happy.


The press wrote that right after I had met Frederik, I took a modeling course to feel more confident! There wasn't anything calculating by that. Fact is, when I started on that course I hadn't met him yet!
BULLSHIT!!! You took Starmakers after meeting Frederik, and if you had an ounce of integrity you would have admitted it and not made such a big deal out of denying it, but you have, and it’s going to haunt you for the rest of your life.


There were expectations in the press, that I could speak fluent Danish, but I couldn't.
And still can’t. Almost four years later, your Danish language skills are shameful, unlike Alexandra, who chose to integrate herself into her new culture. You should be ashamed of yourself, Mary.


And we know that we are a kind of role models for young people. We are seen as an ideal. This is something we discuss, very important.
An ideal what? Couple of lazy parasites?
That’s so cute that you spend time talking about how important you are! OMG, how adorable! Guess what? You’re not. Only to your fangirls who go out to buy dresses like yours, shoes like yours, and knit butt-ugly beanie caps like yours, but that doesn’t make them Followers, it makes them stupid.


If we are going to travel, we can't arrive like anybody else. We will be received by ambassadors, or whoever is appropriate. We cannot be discrete and reserved anymore. We have to announce when we arrive, go by the established protocol, and we have to travel in this formal way.
Can I throw up? Give me a break. When Frederik traveled to see his booty call in Australia he wasn’t received by no goddamn ambassador, ok? You don’t have to announce anything, but then that would mean no media, so you just go ahead and keep those PR people on speed dial, Mary, ok?



I work to prepare myself to my new job, and primarily learning Danish.
And so far, you have failed miserably, because when people can’t understand the shit that’s coming out of your mouth, it means you haven’t learned Danish, yet, you moron.


I have done serious thinking about my new jobs. I have considered many things. Nothing has yet been settled but I have expressed my interest for what I find really exciting and stimulating.
And guess what that is??? Oh Mary, god bless you, you little Pavlov bitch you, stimulated by clothes and shoes.


5 days a week I have Danish lessons or Danish conversation for three hours.
If I spent that much time learning a language and had your skill level, I’d go home. Go home, Mary, to Tasmania. It’s all in English there.



It's important to me to master the language. If you live in a country which has another language than your own, then it's your duty to learn that language, if you want to be a part of that country.
BULLSHIT AGAIN!!! It’s not important to you at all. Not as important as spending money, which you have become really good at, Mary. I call you out as a liar who doesn’t give a shit about integrating herself into her new culture. Not only that, but your daddy and stepmother didn’t bother to learn the language, even though they got jobs and a free apartment in Denmark. Not to mention your pappy's new teeth.



More than anything I have to be the best partner for Frederik.-
You are not. He is worse than ever, even worse than during his early 20s crisis of depression which sent all the palace gray men into a permanent watch. Now he’s almost twice that age and the woman he married is so self obsessed that she barely has time to deal with a husband who is incredibly unhappy and slipping down a very slippery slope.


At some point I'll hope to be recognized as my own person, not just as the partner of Frederik.
Believe me, you are. The “Australian Golddigger” as you have been called by the Danish Media. The Nordic Imelda Marcos. No worries there, mate, people know who you are.



Marriage has to be fun, too. There must be humor and laughter ...
Oh yeah. Because Frederik is smiling a lot with you lately. Riiiight. He smiled a lot when Victoria of Sweden visited. Hmmmmmmm.


The redecoration of our home is very time consuming. It's going to be spectacular. This may surprise some, but we are using quite strong colors on the walls
Time consuming for who? You? Are you doing it yourself? What the fuck? I don’t see your skinny white ass on a ladder, spraying wall texture up there.
And colors? Excuse me, because on those photos of Christian’s first birthday, it looked like the inside of a bowl of oatmeal. The all beige channel.



There's another wonderful aspect to our roles – the people we are able to meet!
But see here, Mary, that should mean you actually look at people when they talk to you, and sadly, you’re too busy looking for cameras.


I have learned not to judge myself too harshly.
That’s clear because you have absolutely no desire to better yourself, other than wearing more expensive clothes. You’ve accepted your mediocrity. I haven’t. I will continue judging you harshly until you stop being a waste of space and air.


I must believe in this, and that there must some reason why I'm here, my destiny.
Oh brother. Destiny. Whatever, Mary. Your destiny was brought about by the fact that Frederik is an idiot.


Frederik doesn't like me to say this, but he's a very lonely person, like we all are.
And you haven’t done a thing to help him. He shouldn’t be lonely, Mary, he should be reveling in his wife and kids. Being alone is one thing, being lonely is a terrible feeling, and you’re not doing anything about it. As long as he puts out the credit card, who cares, right? And frankly, why ARE you saying it if he doesn't want you to, isn't that selling him out for a bit of press? Respect him, Mary.


But the royals have to be smart, too. There has to be a warm, positive feeling about them. Not just doing things because they’ve always been done that way.
Exactly. Which is why you took your kid to the latest hunt, right? Because that’s “not just doing things because they’ve always been done that way.”


How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
Mary's favorite poem, she said if she found someone who embodied that poem, then it was the person for her. I think she had a slightly different version of the poem:
I love thee to the depth and breath and height
Your bank account can reach, it better not get light.