This photoshoot, or rather, these photoshoots, as there were two photographers doing two separate shoots, are complete failures. The Happy Holidays Danish Family Catalog, I mean, images, are so incredibly forced, considering how many times we have seen Mary completely ignore her children in order to hog the camera.
Take this photo. Fred looks clueless, Christian looks weird, as usual, IsNOTabella looks like she has no personality, despite all the bullshit about her being so feisty, and Mary, well, Mary looks happy because she has found a reflective surface, so as long as she's looking at herself, who cares, right? Barf city.
Speaking of barf, I think we're starting with the self-image issues a little young, aren't we? Why is Mary fattening up IsNOTabella like that? I mean, she could roll that baby girl down the hill and no one would know the difference. Considering that Mor Dearest made a point of losing 30 lbs. in order to fit into her own idea of what a Proper Icon is, I can already see the seeds of some serious Mommy-induced image issues for poor IsNOTabella. And also, as I've said, she is definitely NOT a bella so that's two strikes right there.
More PR bullshit. IsNOTabella is so feisty, she is so happy and then so angry, and then you can't resist her if she smiles, says Mary.
Um, no, no, and yeah I can definitely resist this blank-eyed michelin baby.
I dare anyone to think Mary is not posing here. Give me a fucking break. Family, my ass, all she gives a shit about is whether her bangs and highlights look ok.
Let's move on to the J Crew catalog knockoff that's the pictures of Fred and Mary, lovingly looking into each other's eyes. Yeah. 'cause I really believe it.
WTF is this? Looking towards what? Their future? Their loving, besotted, devoted future, sharing each other's virtues and faults, wondering what lays ahead for their children? Give me a fucking break. Frederik can only look forward to more drinking and sailing, to get away from the robot he married, and Mary can only look forward to her next pregnancy and then losing the weight really quickly so she can fit into the next Malene Birger collection. Not to mention getting the next Marianne Dulong pieces so she can wear then Every. Fucking. Day.
All I can say is, who the fuck styles Mary? Because, given that Frederik is all boyish looking, she looks old enough to be his mother here. The pose where a woman's head is hanging over is NEVER FLATTERING. Remember that, Mary, next time you decide to be on top. Every crag and bulge on your white face becomes more prominent, and if you leave the lights on, Fred might wonder if some nasty old banshee's ghost is riding him.
The severe makeup. The butt ugly cap. The buckles on the sleeves and neck of that coat. Sheesh. You into buckles, Mary?
Fake like Pam Anderson's tits. Fake like Jocelyn Wildenstein's face. Fake like Gucci bags sold at someone's home party.
While the Mary fangirls go looking for new, dry panties to wear, the rest of us who are not so easily convinced realize that this circus was a response to the criticism in the Danish media, and to Trine Villemann's book, not to mention the rampant criticism on other media out there. So what do we say, girls, a let's-save-the-marriage pregnancy in 2008? Or a divorce before Freddy is too old to snag someone else?
The only thing that comes to mind when I look at these stupid photos of Mary and Fred are those herpes medicine commercials, where couples embrace languidly and smile for no reason.
9 comments:
Dear Royal Truthie,
You know one sentence/paragraph kept sticking in my throat, a bit like Macbeth after he murdered Duncan, and its this sentence:
“X doesn’t but Uglybella sleepts in OUR room” Oh WHY…WHY would you make refrence to something that we all take for granted that happens…but IT DOES NOT happen, does it? So they need to convince one and all that they have “loving” relationship.
Stuff it. I’ll put my $$$on a DIVORCE. D FOR DAISY granting a D for D-I-V-O-R-C-E!!!!!!!!!
With very Best, and thanks for your regards.
Getafix:-))
Interesting take on the lovey dovey photoshoot.You are right,this is just pure PR with a capital P!
More,more more!!!
"Rinsing out their panties"
OMG, I almost spit my lovely jello fruit cup all over my computer monitor. Keep up the excellent work!
So FAKE!
After more than 3 years of marriage? COME ON!
I love it when Mary says she is SHY. A SHY girl would never snatch the crown prince of DENMARK :) You need many racy strategies to win over the fierce competition.
Getafix, it is this fault of their that will lead them to ruin, the need to overstate what anyone would assume is something normal, but they need it to be newsworthy.
Anonymous 3, Mary is as shy (commercials, posing with Sarah O'Hare, crashing the women's team party in Sydney, etc.) as I am a Mary fangirl.
Dear Royal Trutie,
What you refer to, I think, is called, HUBRIS!!!!!!!!!!
its what Macbeth refered to as his 'vaulting ambition, which o'oerleaps itself
And falls on the other'(I Vii:26).(can't but help comparing these two to Shakespeare's Macbeth!! so alike they are!!)
As for being news-worthy...WHY???
why would they need to be news worthy with such banal actions/behaviours? because its to cover up what is REALLY going on!! that is their relationship is up for dissolution.
with very best for New Year to you RT :-))
Getafix.:-)
What a pair of bumbling village idiots!!! Beyond doubt, the laughing stock of monarchial Europe. They must have been the subject of after-dinner gossips of the other crown princes and princesses!
I've never left a comment here before (I lurk) but this had to be the best write-up I have seen. Ever. I almost had a laugh attack with the whole rinsing out the panties thing (in fact, I don't doubt for an instance that happened with some of the die-hards). Please keep it up. Please!
That beret she is wearing is pretty scary. I like the photo where Meary is shown balancing on a log on the lake. I bet Fred was dying to fucking push her in and get rid of her for good!
Post a Comment