tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-69619481622736504072024-03-22T02:20:52.939-07:00a bogan in Denmarkthe real-life adventures of a social-climber from Hobart, Tasmania, who rubbed a crown prince's chest at a bar and ended up marrying him and having access to his black American ExpressUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger55125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-62666689357168290712008-10-07T14:41:00.000-07:002008-10-07T16:22:26.406-07:00At Home and Abroad - The Broad Likes to Roam<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXqRTv4ldJQsnX8rmPQLviNqGO_leQ8LujpGgHAc2PA-kCXhpHywc4AANwe_vHNoKb0uiNqg4MIPn0mFVt872Ja2eX_tYOrWqQpD07WWzQQg01KsCL-qHJLiH17u76YvF3hTt5VgapwAes/s1600-h/uganda.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXqRTv4ldJQsnX8rmPQLviNqGO_leQ8LujpGgHAc2PA-kCXhpHywc4AANwe_vHNoKb0uiNqg4MIPn0mFVt872Ja2eX_tYOrWqQpD07WWzQQg01KsCL-qHJLiH17u76YvF3hTt5VgapwAes/s320/uganda.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5254532852121392850" /></a><br /><br />Once again, the most repulsive of all crown princesses was sent out to represent her country, and once more, she only represented herself. From wearing a completely over the top and unnecessary mine protection vest - does anyone HONESTLY think she was in any danger at all? - to leaning away from a child and his caretaker, to showing off her new fugly bowling shoes and scarves and pretending to have a thoughtful moment, Mary was as revolting and self-centered in this trip as she has been in every other moment of her pathetic life. <br /><br />Even her much ballyhooed interview with the landmine people was obviously prepped by her PR people, there is no way this vapid slag could articulate those intelligent questions on her own.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn5Vx_NcVz4_gQlDgv0G0tpd9nHuv3XAZZ_vaG8VwodQ6VSaHdGIRHb4eXESmAz2vHjjuPKBgZg3SrdMsLN9ZlsKGjAy0NkbKd6E9Oe9zRA2P7Z1B13gRdiw_0eJndaTry58ygGAKzoXRk/s1600-h/whatinthenameofpotatoes.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn5Vx_NcVz4_gQlDgv0G0tpd9nHuv3XAZZ_vaG8VwodQ6VSaHdGIRHb4eXESmAz2vHjjuPKBgZg3SrdMsLN9ZlsKGjAy0NkbKd6E9Oe9zRA2P7Z1B13gRdiw_0eJndaTry58ygGAKzoXRk/s320/whatinthenameofpotatoes.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5254532799488101906" /></a><br />Ok, seriously, I was babysitting this adorable 3-year-old girl last Saturday and there's some show on her kiddie TV channel where a character says "WHAT IN THE NAME OF POTATOES!?"<br /><br />Just the thought that came to my mind when I saw The Freaky One decked out in all her 80s perm gloriousness. Why not go all the way and wear your ponytail on the side of your head, Mary? It would be just as hideous!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-75239487616633124032008-09-07T02:05:00.000-07:002008-09-07T09:27:45.708-07:00Mary Dearest<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitfhsPbsNjbrbmGj0FqYiXea14DBlHdf4C36nTZT83k-eTYeIdZyV3Da8-b7843kLZcE1wY0ahpQptCX4Zhs2SPd04BUvOAzVVCrbji1O-cqOBX6plLVvWScCF-uT0jpdc2sw5wjNwSaP9/s1600-h/20080904holeshoes.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitfhsPbsNjbrbmGj0FqYiXea14DBlHdf4C36nTZT83k-eTYeIdZyV3Da8-b7843kLZcE1wY0ahpQptCX4Zhs2SPd04BUvOAzVVCrbji1O-cqOBX6plLVvWScCF-uT0jpdc2sw5wjNwSaP9/s320/20080904holeshoes.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243314405300454402" /></a><br />I have complained before about Mary's lack of caring for her children. She can't handle them, she doesn't know what to do when they cry, she doesn't comfort them, etc. But what happened a couple of days ago takes the cake.<br /><br />Mary, the bogan Princess who shows off her Prada boots and Chanel bags every chance she gets, dresses her utter disappointment of a daughter in shoes that have holes in them. You goddamn filthy bitch, Mary. How fucking dare you? <br /><br />Why is it? Because IsNOTabella is ugly? Because she's royal? Because she's got fucked up feet and Fred's face?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr6CoVsxRvXwlg1Njg00d8DK36XCcepFEQEpw9KO25qPmfehOlN18WaqeQ_zLcuAmY5QHwpPgsxEt8mc_RdvGuBRxmdu5cWLzqh0EYMe2yEROdQls5lnXSyZGAc5QZNfwoy1KZhF8JkVoE/s1600-h/shoes.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr6CoVsxRvXwlg1Njg00d8DK36XCcepFEQEpw9KO25qPmfehOlN18WaqeQ_zLcuAmY5QHwpPgsxEt8mc_RdvGuBRxmdu5cWLzqh0EYMe2yEROdQls5lnXSyZGAc5QZNfwoy1KZhF8JkVoE/s320/shoes.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243316914903879474" /></a><br />ONE can only imagine how poor IsNOTabella gets treated at home. Do you think she gets Christian's leftovers for food? DO you think she gets her Bogan brand Huggies diaper changed right away or is she left to stew in her own filth until the nanny notices? Sure, she gets a $700 mink vest, but isn't that more for YOUR glory, Mary? What the hell does the fugly one know? But your Eurotrash Danish friends get to know that you put that piece of shit on her. And now they know you make her wear shoes with holes on them. <br /><br />But your new blue wedges look awesome, and I guess that's the point. The only way you can be more than your daughter is to make her wear rags and shitty shoes. Too bad your little plan isn't working out.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-19893876682123667272008-09-03T02:42:00.000-07:002008-09-03T09:52:30.837-07:00Proof that Mary reads this blogSeems like someONE took my last paragraph to heart. You know, the one where I call her a whore. Because not only has Her Royal Trashiness appeared in a fucking DIAPER AD, but she nearly showed us her sweaty, hairy, naughty bits!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgymR6Sur98B02JqfszBf1HJcPCUGtghuKsyGc-Tw_aIYgJ2CmfBcWEUz0MqPXgWiJAM8e_hOx9-O1dMP41lmr6gonvh1ZJnPvSwwJGJxRIJvnkwLv_MEjvFA4DLGb3qFY-d1UVqwh6Wd6g/s1600-h/maryad.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgymR6Sur98B02JqfszBf1HJcPCUGtghuKsyGc-Tw_aIYgJ2CmfBcWEUz0MqPXgWiJAM8e_hOx9-O1dMP41lmr6gonvh1ZJnPvSwwJGJxRIJvnkwLv_MEjvFA4DLGb3qFY-d1UVqwh6Wd6g/s320/maryad.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241838020782162546" /></a><br />Now the whole outing to get diapers makes total sense. Her designer-casual outfit, the oversized "celebrity" sunglasses, and Mary being alone, to make sure Huggies got good shots of the "normal mum" without any of her ugly sisters or genetically-doomed nieces in tow. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzIbeU-J4uSRsc6P8Z8FdMtASoIvgYr8bUf5OeONrRXTmPodO2v015PJZEDZlS-ldcRK_YulLBfyCXAHZQXCwaeGQsbZ5Oflu3N3uka5nwzuNtwrphlDQCpEFJ4L-U_1lZ_NWodGyzyPcM/s1600-h/maryskirt.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzIbeU-J4uSRsc6P8Z8FdMtASoIvgYr8bUf5OeONrRXTmPodO2v015PJZEDZlS-ldcRK_YulLBfyCXAHZQXCwaeGQsbZ5Oflu3N3uka5nwzuNtwrphlDQCpEFJ4L-U_1lZ_NWodGyzyPcM/s320/maryskirt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241838375989087106" /></a><br />As for her whorish getup, Mary should do as her betters have and weigh down the hems of her skirts. But not even the promise of seeing the royal cooch could get more than a few people at Mary's events, so her people had to pimp out kids from the local school to make for better shots. <br /><br />And by the way, the outfit doesn't fit you, Mary, you might want to try a tailor next time. The saggy boob area, the cheap-looking seams, and the uh-oh skirt just make you look like the bag of trash you are.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-17515686926593815822008-08-29T01:09:00.000-07:002008-08-29T13:42:29.644-07:00Fuck you, Denmark!!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmmYVJiULMvbPGijSgaVzMJicDi0WN3oHNhC2JRs9O9hf3cBEpSU33Efzc3oZYsANbFaHCzx4sroouvf5yhBzL4x_y1Oxb4SV3L8uMKSDDkqe0Dxb1q5_VSC7foNEV-df9zBOEbbrGC5gF/s1600-h/xiansandybay.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmmYVJiULMvbPGijSgaVzMJicDi0WN3oHNhC2JRs9O9hf3cBEpSU33Efzc3oZYsANbFaHCzx4sroouvf5yhBzL4x_y1Oxb4SV3L8uMKSDDkqe0Dxb1q5_VSC7foNEV-df9zBOEbbrGC5gF/s320/xiansandybay.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5240042768120066914" /></a><br />Gotta love the pearls of wisdom that have come out of Mary's mouth, like saying she'd like to enroll Christian in her old Sandy Bay infants school (she took him to paint there), saying she'd like Danish schools to have uniforms like Australian schools, and snapping at Anna from Billed Bladet and the rest of the Danish media to buzz off (the woman who discovered her and made her a celebrity), means that, unequivocally, Mary sees her life in Denmark as something she must ENDURE in order to collect all the benefits, perks, designer clothes, and lifestyle she really DESIRES. And from the looks of things, she barely ENDURES her children, too, using them as props in her neverending quest for publicity, making sure she is always carrying Christian because that way, their faces are at the same camera level. If she let Prince Pumpkinhead walk, then her face wouldn't be in the picture, right? <br /><br />Her attitude in Beijing, partying happily with the Australian athletes and media while barely making appearances at Denmark's events, adds to this theory.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibt5CczTW4D7S2J55MZyLXOUwPBXjb_tFUcmXWSgMDAuEVZOV_jZtGri-8ZbQb-v3otOf2V49yN8TKEjnHbecV2tzSjPuU1iV0DCWV3_vZ54aLXaJg3PT3RSuBH1lCrxt_ky6Qqwi3LI4J/s1600-h/izvest.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibt5CczTW4D7S2J55MZyLXOUwPBXjb_tFUcmXWSgMDAuEVZOV_jZtGri-8ZbQb-v3otOf2V49yN8TKEjnHbecV2tzSjPuU1iV0DCWV3_vZ54aLXaJg3PT3RSuBH1lCrxt_ky6Qqwi3LI4J/s320/izvest.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5240042303973750546" /></a><br />Mary is so ashamed of her daughter, that she ignores IsNOTabella until she's screaming bloody murder, and tries to cover up her lackluster looks by putting her in a butt-ugly $700 MINK VEST !!<br /><br />Insecure bogan already passing on the stupid spending onto your daughter, now IsNOTabella is also going to learn that anything expensive must be good, even if it looks like you're wearing roadkill.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUfIW3oPkVIGdlYwVp-xiiLsHj2u8Yy5s3zIKK3E-4nhFEPPh551H9sgTQfUimHvgn9F7-KAfRxnPxkG89yVa8FS0msRBmq4RonQUCzE6tSy3hz4E3ViVVaXzJE-fW-HgXFosugkaCoJt7/s1600-h/izcries.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUfIW3oPkVIGdlYwVp-xiiLsHj2u8Yy5s3zIKK3E-4nhFEPPh551H9sgTQfUimHvgn9F7-KAfRxnPxkG89yVa8FS0msRBmq4RonQUCzE6tSy3hz4E3ViVVaXzJE-fW-HgXFosugkaCoJt7/s320/izcries.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5240042182919847986" /></a><br />But no, couldn't possibly let go of the next heir to the throne to calm down your ugly daughter, could you? Many people have ugly kids, Mary, deal with it. Why don't you ask your sisters for advice? They have genetically doomed girls. Ask them if they despise them as much as you do IsNOTabella.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9V5ZfDxQYWVFup8Qwin1mkDag30_XZeFv0FpkoSlT_Sgq36mb5hrMm8oKG2059D7vkspu0e0FKs1Cxoh06vBOO4wpzpl28WiJo5gzwBYGcxd4vQv0bAlmT-_OC3Bt9P0htcD4Yu8bCXnZ/s1600-h/wrinkled.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9V5ZfDxQYWVFup8Qwin1mkDag30_XZeFv0FpkoSlT_Sgq36mb5hrMm8oKG2059D7vkspu0e0FKs1Cxoh06vBOO4wpzpl28WiJo5gzwBYGcxd4vQv0bAlmT-_OC3Bt9P0htcD4Yu8bCXnZ/s320/wrinkled.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5240042023223339394" /></a><br />Your attitude is disgusting, Mary. Where the hell would you be if it weren't for Denmark and the slow Danes? And specifically, that near-imbecilic slow Dane you married? Would you be in Prada? Would you travel with 18 pieces of luggage ANYWHERE? Would you have Chanel handbags? <br /><br />You are nothing but a disgusting whore, barely putting up with the awkward client while keeping your eyes on the wad of cash on the night table.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-71153947133688930542008-08-26T01:32:00.000-07:002008-08-26T07:44:03.652-07:00Fuck You, Frederik<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZS4RBcIXTnPsUiigjTyLoB_gEGbcSTrm9ARFAF0ZTtj7F6G0pm1PCZkPFcqMcb5KPRY4Gn6aRZO259Z_4-Kxf95yWc0wg_0wbmVMBxTx9oT10OtUXpw88SoyR8g0fXjntCFh3yVIj1OAm/s1600-h/20080823fredout.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZS4RBcIXTnPsUiigjTyLoB_gEGbcSTrm9ARFAF0ZTtj7F6G0pm1PCZkPFcqMcb5KPRY4Gn6aRZO259Z_4-Kxf95yWc0wg_0wbmVMBxTx9oT10OtUXpw88SoyR8g0fXjntCFh3yVIj1OAm/s320/20080823fredout.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5238836086299156514" /></a><br />I'm sorry, darlings, I don't care what spin the royal PR peeps or the sugar boards try to create for what happened here, what it boils down to is one out-of-control bitch Prada Princess, angry as shit over her hubby's partying, who did something so incredibly passive-aggressive that shrinks everywhere must be dying to get her into a counseling session.<br /><br />Knowing that Frederik was arriving in Hobart - and don't give me any shit about Mary not knowing, because that's fucking bullshit, ok? - Mary ensured that she and everyone else would be out when Frederik arrived, leaving the Pathetic Crown Prince to knock on doors and make phone calls to find out when he could possibly be let in and reunite with his family.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaWCJXlE3FcEwgTZqLcKukbl7QDvQHF27ZO9LFtBHya37ZqMJ28DCrsDrtd3uuerYkicKtWUKy5aggiy2BNC9ZAgQ4a8QrRMWaiQDPqx0WX4okJmBguui-rEs9OQxblTxCg0_KnIbwKExP/s1600-h/20080823reunion.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaWCJXlE3FcEwgTZqLcKukbl7QDvQHF27ZO9LFtBHya37ZqMJ28DCrsDrtd3uuerYkicKtWUKy5aggiy2BNC9ZAgQ4a8QrRMWaiQDPqx0WX4okJmBguui-rEs9OQxblTxCg0_KnIbwKExP/s320/20080823reunion.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5238837003693853122" /></a><br />Finally, Mary and gang return, and Frederik runs to greet his children. Mary does a meek kiss and hand-on-the-back thing, because she knows she's gone overboard and knows that there are photogs out there. She knows Frederik has been caught on photo and video, locked out of the house, but she can't well get out of the car and make a scene, so she makes kissy-kissy for the paps.<br /><br />This is one of the more revolting stunts Mary has pulled, and my advice to Frederik is, sweetheart, you're still young enough to find yourself another woman, one who will treat both your children equally, and see you as more than a source of income.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-30455309662100621522008-08-22T01:13:00.000-07:002008-08-22T11:39:04.791-07:00Diapers and Prada, a.k.a. Mary in Hobart<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXGYuR10HU7pmeuBTCLwh7cHIRE_VcPpfjVKTtOiy17ceMrsbxw_rliFIfIc0yowCk8q_zenoeahsaA79yCs59FZvkl2NDyLCW5Ui7Sn7z6_Ls_XQBqgoQvwykuGqfqIKmrri6I2gHPjde/s1600-h/20080819e.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXGYuR10HU7pmeuBTCLwh7cHIRE_VcPpfjVKTtOiy17ceMrsbxw_rliFIfIc0yowCk8q_zenoeahsaA79yCs59FZvkl2NDyLCW5Ui7Sn7z6_Ls_XQBqgoQvwykuGqfqIKmrri6I2gHPjde/s320/20080819e.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237407824623153442" /></a><br />In the first few days of this latest "private visit to Australia" by Her Royal Trashiness, we have been treated to the appearance of Holy Mother Mary going to the drugstore to buy diapers.<br /><br />You've got to be kidding me, right? <br /><br />Oh wait, that was AFTER Mary was photographed covering Prince Pumpkinhead's mouth as he screamed his head off at the airport, because his favorite nanny has been fired due to the fact that Christian prefers to Mummy Dearest.<br /><br />The non-famewhorish thing to do would have been to ask one of the sisters to pick up a bunch of diapers, because, let's face it the ONE PACKAGE PER CHILD that Mary picked up sure ain't going to last them through the whole trip. So expect another camera-worthy trip to the drugstore.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinl5ROSD8sSyj2YMsp9isU0FqTeyaliDBuIZDn28JQ0sqFhi_r4OZefdCfqvy4iCNcyygcKtcsBxBYvDDod4aCwUjO6blSAGXOmZFuPwwixS_eCeJVdsuKictRN-SgrJ1Ne_YDwInV_oCD/s1600-h/20080820d.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinl5ROSD8sSyj2YMsp9isU0FqTeyaliDBuIZDn28JQ0sqFhi_r4OZefdCfqvy4iCNcyygcKtcsBxBYvDDod4aCwUjO6blSAGXOmZFuPwwixS_eCeJVdsuKictRN-SgrJ1Ne_YDwInV_oCD/s320/20080820d.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237413164888525858" /></a><br />Then we have the Country Heiress look for a simple trip to the playground. Holy fucking bogans! You'd think the bitch had just landed on the cover of Town and Country. Prada boots, vest and jacket over a pristine shirt. This sure ain't the kind of Lycra Paradise shit Mary Donaldson used to wear. And honeys, that's just the point.<br /><br />Mary may not have another grand tour like her first one, where she was paraded around national monuments and decked out like the Queen Mother, but she is sure as hell going to do her best to present HER Perfect Princess persona. The persona that wears Prada boots to push her kids on a swing, the persona that travels with 18 pieces of luggage but dashes out to buy nappies. Oh, what a mum!!!<br /><br />Oh, what a piece of shit famewhore bitch!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-85259134745784558372008-08-11T13:47:00.000-07:002008-08-12T17:15:49.981-07:00The Olympics of Self Promotion8 years after that tragic Olympiad where famewhoring chubbette Mary Donaldson snared the imbecilic Crown Prince Frederik of Denmark, we are, once again, treated to photos of the Clown Prince Couple (love that, credit the fab RD posters) "reliving their amour" in an Olympic setting. <br /><br />Yeah. What-EVAH!!!<br /><br />The only Olympic thing about Fred and Mary being in Beijing is Mary's Olympic-Sized Need for Attention to the point that she has been ignoring the Danish contingent (not continent, sweeties, contingent, means the Danish team, k?) in favor of socializing with the only people who still care about Her Royal Whoriness - the Australians. You know, the people she quickly left behind as soon as it was clear Frederik was in the bag, the nationality she abandoned in a jiffy because it was more lucrative to be a Princess of Denmark? The only people who understand her when she talks because between her faux-English accent, her bad Danish, and her bad-native English, we just can't understand the words that are coming out of her mouth!!!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzfr04wuaQaq4o0cMCKVYwVBvgliZLFM_HavXM4vGmrVLa2xKG1Jqv-wC4tsN3maoulFh8s5gkf4yY-ZIb_JOYQMbERIMLe2za3A7lyWZdY2vQo8WwYVDbmpagO_bByaKQ7Z6OUlDgvT5u/s1600-h/olmakeup.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzfr04wuaQaq4o0cMCKVYwVBvgliZLFM_HavXM4vGmrVLa2xKG1Jqv-wC4tsN3maoulFh8s5gkf4yY-ZIb_JOYQMbERIMLe2za3A7lyWZdY2vQo8WwYVDbmpagO_bByaKQ7Z6OUlDgvT5u/s320/olmakeup.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233786989872299042" /></a><br />However, that doesn't stop us from enjoying ourselves at Mary's expense, beginning with the Olympic-Sized amounf of makeup Miss Perfect Skin wore to the sweltering opening ceremonies. You can see it here, melting off her sun-damaged, large-pored, overly madeup face.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8hpwKvw03CKTfFmFcGw6Spkzi7kYq7zac3ncXHI5clxzQ5f_78N_TlE14y3XQ1W_o-7WciRN2eUUG6lh6rcNCdJost89WEz51eysaBqPJfQmosy3Oyj3o5iJyzVpzLq9R6__Tdu-Nvlty/s1600-h/OLsausagecasing.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8hpwKvw03CKTfFmFcGw6Spkzi7kYq7zac3ncXHI5clxzQ5f_78N_TlE14y3XQ1W_o-7WciRN2eUUG6lh6rcNCdJost89WEz51eysaBqPJfQmosy3Oyj3o5iJyzVpzLq9R6__Tdu-Nvlty/s320/OLsausagecasing.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233787337422425826" /></a><br />The array of shit that has been Mary's wardrobe begins with this ludicrous print dress that resembles a sausage casing due to the unfortunate panel of ruching and the fact that Mary should have worn one size bigger. <br /><br />Sorry, Mares, you are no longer the emaciated skeleton from the week before your wedding. Which is a good thing, but you are no longer "sample size" as Australian Vogue breathlessly declared. You must dress to the body you have now if you are to look semi-decent.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkeaYaPXyNvS59Xdom2O7Ax7DbV1dtUftQuq4RwrBXEgihLRhNbGjn5sNTb6B41PURhPIMTdT-4zhDbeVCE6LH72FuQO6jZWrYl51J_MUYmvmgL1dFZ5XhWX8631cXy8_4IyH3WMkGkZBK/s1600-h/OLatrocious.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkeaYaPXyNvS59Xdom2O7Ax7DbV1dtUftQuq4RwrBXEgihLRhNbGjn5sNTb6B41PURhPIMTdT-4zhDbeVCE6LH72FuQO6jZWrYl51J_MUYmvmgL1dFZ5XhWX8631cXy8_4IyH3WMkGkZBK/s320/OLatrocious.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233787927355942546" /></a><br />Another bad "trend" that Princess Loser wears probably because it's expensive, never mind that it does nothing for her Macho Macho Man figure was this black dress, better suited to a petite type like Letizia, not a lumberjack-wannabe like Mary and her tranny sister.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3LnnREvABPUdC8A2G2gOES6PrJw2der8x5YjAm0_hgxUp-W3jnByMvqHJpS0en-X4CfCdpSiz7t2UwZ2VUziBt4_8zrvHldoRa6pm_mlSvO3Eg7DAAIIpSTtn5JV31Ea7YOpCRFY0L2tq/s1600-h/OLbruni.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3LnnREvABPUdC8A2G2gOES6PrJw2der8x5YjAm0_hgxUp-W3jnByMvqHJpS0en-X4CfCdpSiz7t2UwZ2VUziBt4_8zrvHldoRa6pm_mlSvO3Eg7DAAIIpSTtn5JV31Ea7YOpCRFY0L2tq/s320/OLbruni.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233788148260542194" /></a><br />The only semi-decent ensemble was this navy blouse with white pants - gee, Mary, would it have killed you to wear the blouse in RED?? You know, Denmark's colors? Sheesh, do I have to do all the thinking here?? - which reminded me of the evening gown Mme. Bruni-Sarkozy wore on her spectacular visit to the UK. <br /><br />Maybe that is what Mary is doing, copying someone with style. And frankly, considering she is such an ignorant slag who doesn't know quality unless it has a label on it, that's what she should do, copy someone with style. Because Mary, you are a soon-to-be-40-year-old woman who still dresses like she has no clue. Because you HAVE no clue, and that idiot "stylist" of yours doesn't have a clue, either, she just uses you to get HER name out there, is what I think, and everyone at the Palace laughs when you leave the house with your bra showing, or, quel horreur!, with your UNDERWEAR showing, your stupid whore.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-69462372250501477732008-07-31T13:56:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:39:59.392-08:00Oh please, the book's not TOUGH ENOUGH!!!Many of you have probably heard about <a href="http://www.andartespress.com">1015 Copenhagen K</a>, the book that sent shockwaves through Denmark, and most importantly, through Mary's thin, bleached skin, and made her Invisaligned teeth chatter with rage.<br /><br />Frankly, other than being surprised at some of the revelations regarding Alexandra, Countess of Frederiksborg, I can hardly call anything in this book shocking. That this stuff is not published in DK because of respect to the Crypt Keeper, her fat husband, Henrik, the near-imbecilic lazy ass Crown Prince, happy drunky Jokke, and the rest of the gang, is one thing, but come on. We kind of figured out LONG AGO that Frederik is fucked up in the head and can't talk in public without having a major meltdown. We know Margrethe isn't the warmest of mothers, we know Henrik is a drama queen, we know Jokke has bad teeth and we definitely know that Mary is a useless piece of designer-clad garbage.<br /><br />What Trine has done is say what no one dares to say outside of a few message boards. What Trine has done is say what many say in whispers, and has long been rumored. And frankly, I think she didn't go further in order to keep her book marketable, because had she gone as far as she could have gone, Mary would be reaching for the pills and Freddy would be right behind Captain Jack Sparrow sailing away forever, and Danes would be overtaken by their undeserved loyalty to this bunch of asshats and would have completely rejected the book.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitANlbE3ccGmal6IkHq71_UUbWl4ODuZB4aH_cTZElgfSeawL6nU_ALT4_CMdJ4ytCPgx9Rlz9McPxnhTJk9pG0wyGUi9jgx8iXXmQujRe84di9-1LMNskDMjYsC1Tv3vzTcgrhBl-PvjZ/s1600-h/Katja.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitANlbE3ccGmal6IkHq71_UUbWl4ODuZB4aH_cTZElgfSeawL6nU_ALT4_CMdJ4ytCPgx9Rlz9McPxnhTJk9pG0wyGUi9jgx8iXXmQujRe84di9-1LMNskDMjYsC1Tv3vzTcgrhBl-PvjZ/s320/Katja.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229351743188160626" /></a><br />When was the last time Frederik looked THIS confident, secure, and proud? Not in the last few years, people, that's for sure. Too bad that Margrethe pretty much fucked over her sons by demanding foreign brides, because next to Miz Mary, Freddles ain't never gonna look as radiant as he did with Katja. He doesn't even have to look at her to project happiness. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihSI2x4s4qRGK-g3e0BIDO-ti_jlQIitXZgrJzpO-UT1KyP2p3o0K4NZL5fXC71Aidxxs7qvmgqHT7RQ925RKn7QHEwVKRkE57jOldnNa8MlOj0vC9xKrtv2QB3m9KzKVLtfq-D48THSrH/s1600-h/20080526hands.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihSI2x4s4qRGK-g3e0BIDO-ti_jlQIitXZgrJzpO-UT1KyP2p3o0K4NZL5fXC71Aidxxs7qvmgqHT7RQ925RKn7QHEwVKRkE57jOldnNa8MlOj0vC9xKrtv2QB3m9KzKVLtfq-D48THSrH/s320/20080526hands.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229352442154392434" /></a><br />Compare that with Mary desperately grabbing his hand in the balcony appearance when he turned 40. He starts laughing nervously, that stupid laugh that begs to be smacked off his face, while Mary grits her teeth and attempts to appear like a happy family, while ignoring her massively un-cute children.<br /><br />We already knew that Ole Henriksen had been dropped like a hot potato once he blabbed about taking care of Mary's skin, even though yapping about her perfectly groomed eyebrows and her freshly shampooed hair - must have been the only time she washed her hair because it always looks oily - was about as sugary as you can get. How did we know? Because she dropped her friend Beatrice Tarnawski, who introduced her to Frederik. Mary is a cold, calculating, callow cow of a woman, and if Trine thinks she is sparing any thoughts to saving the fricking Danish Monarchy, she's delusional. Mary has only thoughts for herself, for posing the right way, for wearing a shitload of makeup and collecting Chanel handbags, for becoming the celebrity she always dreamed in her fat old Hobart days, when she posed with Sarah O'Hare and chased z-list fame as much as she could. <br /><br />Trine is giving Mary way too much credit here. How on earth can Mary undo decades of damage done to Frederik if she doesn't give a shit about him, other than making sure he doesn't take the credit cards away. She is as shallow as dog spit and smells just as bad, given her aversion to antiperspirant. Besides, Trine, don't you know the first rule of becoming a happier person? No one can do it but yourself. People with far worse tribulations than coddled, pissy Frederik have made a happy, healthy life for themselves. If this lazy, useless, stammering 40-year-old man who will only be king because he emerged out of the right womb and has done NOTHING to earn any of his pretty little medals, lifestyle, salary, celebrity, or anything he enjoys, can't stop whining about mummy not giving him enough hugs and grow a fucking pair, no ex-chubbette, fake-accented bitch is going to do it for him.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-72287824632358170122008-07-04T08:18:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:39:59.648-08:00Miss IndependenceHow fitting is it that my eyes land on these photos as I sit back after a wonderful 4th of July barbecue (you know, the kind Mary would throw after her princess baby girl's christening, except mine was fun) - looks like Miz Mary is becoming Independent! Well, not really, she is completely dependent on Margrethe's chilly good will, and on the Black Amex for any more Prada frocks, and on Frederik not getting sick of her, and on the Australian taxpayers for her future trips there, and . . . yikes. ANYHOO, here's the cougar as I saw her on Independence Day.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIKlfnQX9pZaHutz4OveK7rK4l2uKHsZs_DF2D4DzLu-DntzWNT0AWy4RUwjIFowmvXnfKeMdBjv4hKWxPyS9pVb0U2UL_p02nFOfJaIs6KjB4QVieCoH0YIRnTrL_XXsnFEbQA_7vh0Hs/s1600-h/20080704maryjokke.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIKlfnQX9pZaHutz4OveK7rK4l2uKHsZs_DF2D4DzLu-DntzWNT0AWy4RUwjIFowmvXnfKeMdBjv4hKWxPyS9pVb0U2UL_p02nFOfJaIs6KjB4QVieCoH0YIRnTrL_XXsnFEbQA_7vh0Hs/s320/20080704maryjokke.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5219365290513481762" /></a><br />Yes, Mary, we all know Marie is younger. And cuter. And sweeter. And chic-er. And has a petite figure you will NEVER have, no matter how much money you throw away. And she's French. You're Australian. Well, you're both Danish now but still, she's Champagne, you're Fosters, and you ain't never gonna be Champagne, sistah! But to make googly eyes at Jokke and lean in a la Gabrielle Solis? The good thing is, Frederik prolly doesn't care. Or is that a bad thing?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR8RVNB73ZZfIQK-Q0PgYMV6gM4lempkpaCIUaUn7KG14do5-mwaPBJhMmaL1hvj9OQh0KLjek_MlBtfojvPZHZbW1S3CiroPC_VzUjQ2ragusn76YKXSXAxFzQvtm6NmwyzqQxq_an9O4/s1600-h/maryandsorenjessen.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR8RVNB73ZZfIQK-Q0PgYMV6gM4lempkpaCIUaUn7KG14do5-mwaPBJhMmaL1hvj9OQh0KLjek_MlBtfojvPZHZbW1S3CiroPC_VzUjQ2ragusn76YKXSXAxFzQvtm6NmwyzqQxq_an9O4/s320/maryandsorenjessen.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5219366224084691650" /></a><br />Now, here is Mary, wearing Soren Jessen's jacket. Soren is a FOF (Friend of Fred) although this might be payback for the baroness. Was this the chap who had a baroness gf stolen by Freddy or viceversa or is that another Soren? Wonder where Our Mary left her array of cardigans and scarves. She's so fricking addicted to them you'd THINK she wouldn't need some man's jacket, wouldn't you? And gee, Mary, why the coy smile now? You usually can't wait to look at the cameras, why not this time?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-63417971867788841382008-06-23T01:08:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:00.291-08:00How To Look Bad - on purposeImagine you are rich beyond measure. Price tags have ceased to be something you bother with, discounts are for the plebe, and sales are for the unwashed masses. You can pretty much wear what you want, when you want. Imagine there are designers, good ones, clamoring for you to wear their things. Imagine you can now wear Chanel, Prada, and Gucci, have diamonds dripping down your ears. Imagine you can now have any beauty treatment imaginable, your skin will be perfection, your eyes wrinkle free, your lips always ready to smile gently, almost humbly for all the good luck you've had.<br /><br />Now imagine you are Princess Mary of Denmark.<br /><br />Bitch just WANTS to look bad! <br /><br />If you don't believe me, just check out these unlikely ensembles of distaste Bitch has put together just in the last week.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWJ99wYIi5fQuHi0wyHwxuEtYktROhkfLBAvrRr0iQpD35m2A_44jBcnOM8_OhWqHCCwIgz0p2261HNDAMZ-tptpg0vaABTTNp36FzpGaRgp3hWhAwbffC42D5eV7sTbsyxQm5sNitaN7l/s1600-h/browntop.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWJ99wYIi5fQuHi0wyHwxuEtYktROhkfLBAvrRr0iQpD35m2A_44jBcnOM8_OhWqHCCwIgz0p2261HNDAMZ-tptpg0vaABTTNp36FzpGaRgp3hWhAwbffC42D5eV7sTbsyxQm5sNitaN7l/s320/browntop.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215205975681185890" /></a><br />Today's outfit in London. This top is about as unflattering as it gets for Mary's build. Other than her formerly favorite Lycra/Spandex Starmakers tops, this lovely brown top is wasted on Mary's barely-there bosom, humongous shoulders, and generally butch build. The girly sleeves are a joke on her massive arms. Leave this one to the Letizias of the world, pet.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQscPz9T2nTYrnR7V_RWCgUtbiyXsqibNEib-krfF4ZBVu9xSH_KP9bqgwaqc_EsS6vAiCzXn7SFuN9yz2om10Fw2bMwkgCfHGbldjEQjCDADUscv5y7Ql_8fxoaoUGti_gFN8flysCWVZ/s1600-h/jacket.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQscPz9T2nTYrnR7V_RWCgUtbiyXsqibNEib-krfF4ZBVu9xSH_KP9bqgwaqc_EsS6vAiCzXn7SFuN9yz2om10Fw2bMwkgCfHGbldjEQjCDADUscv5y7Ql_8fxoaoUGti_gFN8flysCWVZ/s320/jacket.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215206415401066882" /></a><br />I have to say, it's really sad when even your own clothes stand up away from you. Just look at this poor jacket. It's practically ripping itself off Mary's back. This is what happens when One does not have proper tailoring done to One's clothes.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjzvM_J00ZMq1LWlMCF0mzBBZ0p7G9A4SEJtBpl13Ijw6T-gLQ3AfgOmM1nP4OXrLLhYL-8plyMWYYu5UbRixroY5lFQHBdQHYZs6kIqvebBo25vnBfXu5dEHti5Mu0jIl6RvsDX-nbKSQ/s1600-h/makeup.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjzvM_J00ZMq1LWlMCF0mzBBZ0p7G9A4SEJtBpl13Ijw6T-gLQ3AfgOmM1nP4OXrLLhYL-8plyMWYYu5UbRixroY5lFQHBdQHYZs6kIqvebBo25vnBfXu5dEHti5Mu0jIl6RvsDX-nbKSQ/s320/makeup.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215206744936310082" /></a><br />This is a huge amount of makeup for daytime. Even with photography, day shots are usually softer than nighttime and Mary should have planned accordingly. She has caked on an enormous amount of foundation but not powder, which means she looks sweaty and oily. She also has shimmery eyeshadow which is not good on someone with as many eye area wrinkles as Mary, but there you go. What do I know? I'm only a fashion and beauty expert. I would have slapped some Preparation H on those undereyes, first thing, although I am surprised by the fact she has not used botox yet, given the terrible state of her skin. A wax on her sideburns wuold have been good, too.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHSoenju-0IsjkPA8_AvNzH3H2N8q98NoIS4e7WC-pFmw8RoJujSBvgcxGqaVrjv_X4MntJ3BcJUg65AEqg3TZvczAOm3-7FXqvs3Eyi4YZZZjZjzVeDbM4kT_sd0g3q3pI4LoUp0I6e-b/s1600-h/pitstain.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHSoenju-0IsjkPA8_AvNzH3H2N8q98NoIS4e7WC-pFmw8RoJujSBvgcxGqaVrjv_X4MntJ3BcJUg65AEqg3TZvczAOm3-7FXqvs3Eyi4YZZZjZjzVeDbM4kT_sd0g3q3pI4LoUp0I6e-b/s320/pitstain.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215207476958793490" /></a><br />Speaking of sweaty, here we are treated to yet another instance of Mary showing off her pit stains. This is disgusting. This is basic grooming, and any idiot out there, let alone a fucking PRINCESS who is in public all the time, should know better than not be prepared. Shame on you, Mary, you useless slag.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDIfLZquudtemjzYQ4tYJP9wkL_9SWYeLexJ23TGSiCkjTf-BRAtDhmBfPNyYn7j_jWWmDRkX_b__IOevq9IsEPwTzNj6QkPZ4ABmq_kueUtyd9S34EkCvzAKdPLeOPZ-CTA5Bu9Ki9ASF/s1600-h/wrap.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDIfLZquudtemjzYQ4tYJP9wkL_9SWYeLexJ23TGSiCkjTf-BRAtDhmBfPNyYn7j_jWWmDRkX_b__IOevq9IsEPwTzNj6QkPZ4ABmq_kueUtyd9S34EkCvzAKdPLeOPZ-CTA5Bu9Ki9ASF/s320/wrap.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5215207877453100738" /></a><br />Another designer gown, another mess. Here is Mary in an incredibly unflattering color, and a wrap she has no idea what to do with. Come to think of it, what the fuck IS that? It has a collar, but nothing else. Shit. Should have asked for something else, Mare. The puce plum color washes her out. The go-go dancer bun is aging, and she keeps fiddling with the wrap because she has no sense of herself and just plain how to BE. <br /><br />So dear ones, here is just one week's worth of How to Ruin Couture, brought to you by Princess Mary, because if our gal can't ruin Prada, who can?Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-13067999670572323982008-06-21T13:17:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:00.662-08:00All those photoshoots for nuthin'Because ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, Mary fangirls and detractors, the SECOND that Mary lets down her guard and doesn't position all her facial muscles properly for the cameras, the MOMENT she forgets that cameras capture ALL expressions, not just the ones she wants, this is what we end up with:<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVmuE6Ra1RvUKhFx1fu46xTX-1obcJazCVNOmOF5BrWm9fFYkI7xr7gOVLxISAtvl-CbUbwWtv0NVjnPWXcVdtRdUAKnMRqHa70Z6Xuw078etZtqdF_H8BF0pFTp2qr3AovO27IM6GcOiI/s1600-h/uglymary.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVmuE6Ra1RvUKhFx1fu46xTX-1obcJazCVNOmOF5BrWm9fFYkI7xr7gOVLxISAtvl-CbUbwWtv0NVjnPWXcVdtRdUAKnMRqHa70Z6Xuw078etZtqdF_H8BF0pFTp2qr3AovO27IM6GcOiI/s320/uglymary.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5214540187837616514" /></a><br /><br />An incredibly unflattering snapshot of Our Mary looking much like her sister, the really ugly one. An expression that no amount of photoshop can save, and no amount of airbrushing could erase.<br /><br />Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you The Real Mary.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-68533475737347533472008-06-17T02:04:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:02.010-08:00Desperate CougarLet's face it, Mary is as much a "housewife" as I am a Mary fangirl, but lately she has been looking rather . . . desperate. Like one in a group of divorcees that go out to dinner to tell themselves life is good while they ogle the twentysomething waiter.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4b0PmFyN05z7q33wkYOc-YTM2kaL3Xin8i7ayQT2IlB9snw5qs2T49gdP7MFu14RQmTcyt2h8aH75wqQE94nto3pTuKF0Nsk7e-yeDOUE8sWkWn5sjIjfVGb1ZM3MKPXvCZp5outlLOEx/s1600-h/20080513maryunhcr.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4b0PmFyN05z7q33wkYOc-YTM2kaL3Xin8i7ayQT2IlB9snw5qs2T49gdP7MFu14RQmTcyt2h8aH75wqQE94nto3pTuKF0Nsk7e-yeDOUE8sWkWn5sjIjfVGb1ZM3MKPXvCZp5outlLOEx/s320/20080513maryunhcr.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212870323771312898" /></a><br />It began with Mary wearing this SEE THROUGH FUCHSIA blouse to an UNHCR meeting. I mean, really, the UNHCR?? Completely inappropriate but then again, it's Our Mary we're talking about, she is the Queen of Inappropriate.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3x162N9lELMLTpPKXPewDGv8bjolAU7o620L_JKX3qkA7Ev9cLXj8iAi4A_lj4RXpZ88-AhK-c2WkY5gdwAn1_Rt88-QZrObtxmmMkBeJ7lgNBPUEgb_LSYeFof8YRuNBiQVTHYojDn9A/s1600-h/20080514c.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3x162N9lELMLTpPKXPewDGv8bjolAU7o620L_JKX3qkA7Ev9cLXj8iAi4A_lj4RXpZ88-AhK-c2WkY5gdwAn1_Rt88-QZrObtxmmMkBeJ7lgNBPUEgb_LSYeFof8YRuNBiQVTHYojDn9A/s320/20080514c.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212870859013333250" /></a><br />The very next day came a too-short skirt in a desperately ugly print with bizarre black stripes all over the place. And topped with a rigid, formal black jacket. I don't know if this is Mary's way of saying she has a split personality but man, this outfit sucked!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyhc-dtqtRASLCgeCwpn2Ba5z7i4qJxi9Xm6ZhcEV-QH1RAhNN0y3y-mg4xCC_gd8VKWEKsiKFCugR2QgE91uKd2waAGtGBGVfaLs43kii7Cmv_qAIgr5Ti7sMwBElueY9jkieKbarwnS_/s1600-h/20080523a.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyhc-dtqtRASLCgeCwpn2Ba5z7i4qJxi9Xm6ZhcEV-QH1RAhNN0y3y-mg4xCC_gd8VKWEKsiKFCugR2QgE91uKd2waAGtGBGVfaLs43kii7Cmv_qAIgr5Ti7sMwBElueY9jkieKbarwnS_/s320/20080523a.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212871598792789634" /></a><br />This "casual" outfit didn't fool anyone. Want to see casual chic? Google photos of the new Princess Marie on her honeymoon. Casual, natural, and classy. Gee, maybe Mary could learn from Marie!!!<br />The next generation is already being groomed to dress badly and in ugly colors, as we see Chubbarella dressed just like Mor Dearest.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_db11E01Adlw9XmPaA3eOXBom1HyrFSYP9SNoHWue3UPO6_a1pl3HDsVu45tsQOUwrMh9aYPnojSbvrH_GnBDMZqB56dfLz6X7F4ytZrHfYxFujhQw1lQOYeDx08OrdNEmLF5Ig0MMdEk/s1600-h/20080531.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_db11E01Adlw9XmPaA3eOXBom1HyrFSYP9SNoHWue3UPO6_a1pl3HDsVu45tsQOUwrMh9aYPnojSbvrH_GnBDMZqB56dfLz6X7F4ytZrHfYxFujhQw1lQOYeDx08OrdNEmLF5Ig0MMdEk/s320/20080531.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212872329365296418" /></a><br />Here is the cougar in her natural habitat. Short, loud dress to insinuate she still has the goods, even if her husband barely notices. Strappy heels WITH AN ANKLET - can we possibly get trashier than that? And, to top it off, a musical number designated to make sure everyone's eyes are on her. At her husband's 40th birthday party. Because heaven forbid the attention not be on Mary.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuusTRPc-qVsJpFPtf5w-hZCZdUGSU0uM09QioO6o2i8FGsc6kH6QVKMg-5tqudT8hHDuysvhdxTLh72oYjPJQeFAftkCs9QRKxyZY_gMkn4y9bXs7vD-V9nUvU49bWBcei6blNiaaip58/s1600-h/20080603noringsmary.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuusTRPc-qVsJpFPtf5w-hZCZdUGSU0uM09QioO6o2i8FGsc6kH6QVKMg-5tqudT8hHDuysvhdxTLh72oYjPJQeFAftkCs9QRKxyZY_gMkn4y9bXs7vD-V9nUvU49bWBcei6blNiaaip58/s320/20080603noringsmary.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212873169504295794" /></a><br />Soon after, the Model Mother must make an appearance with her child, who still refuses to connect with her since he has already connected with Nanny Mette (burn!).<br />By the way, Mary, where the hell are your wedding and engagement rings?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjNwPqH7BophGpa9crxVy1as2qhSV7g7R5wzQTjcay7O3e-NzhUKKJ2dJ2_pzVW5OojeMeAz8y6Hdz9rJFB8ZkmPVkl_W0fR9rc-hJwCGn48M5tPDnxdLngcTQi9c4Sfq_2of1sIFWf8t1/s1600-h/2008060828_Crown_Princess_Mary.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjNwPqH7BophGpa9crxVy1as2qhSV7g7R5wzQTjcay7O3e-NzhUKKJ2dJ2_pzVW5OojeMeAz8y6Hdz9rJFB8ZkmPVkl_W0fR9rc-hJwCGn48M5tPDnxdLngcTQi9c4Sfq_2of1sIFWf8t1/s320/2008060828_Crown_Princess_Mary.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212873526037331042" /></a><br />The cougar in another typical outfit from Forever 21. If you don't know what Forever 21 is, it's a chain of stores that sell $5 tops, the latest trend, low quality stuff to last just for the season, for people who have a lot of clothes and don't know how to put them together.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhV_smGn7BOidM3Gx3ykaZId1pwGlN_xNIxfGlf_LteU8l7ieeY7_yCWBNivljL_D1dp_vJQSI4Hbgrt3J9xdNF3pbbhlMdNklDeZR1szvOgecOZ1805fRmHb4Uc_DTbnA3E53-dMwkwUu_/s1600-h/20080608x15_Frederik_Mary.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhV_smGn7BOidM3Gx3ykaZId1pwGlN_xNIxfGlf_LteU8l7ieeY7_yCWBNivljL_D1dp_vJQSI4Hbgrt3J9xdNF3pbbhlMdNklDeZR1szvOgecOZ1805fRmHb4Uc_DTbnA3E53-dMwkwUu_/s320/20080608x15_Frederik_Mary.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212873940504526770" /></a><br />Going to a fellow cougar's concert - Kylie Minogue - Mary wears another unflattering short dress with completely mismatched shoes, and a youthful (she hopes) ponytail to pull back all the wrinkles around the eyes. Maybe she should try the tiny braids Marlene Dietrich used to have done under her hair to pull back the skin. Very painful but effective.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxW_RVjgFCNAHU_jZuz5q9wyiZaxw88YjN-SNaf5zNAlTXTgKjzMiaHbhyt2cdWCBcr-iWsg-SYtWJGdCXnv5nLbCp2epA8UXNGImWhxiuGidwq2Pjn7OYpK47PADFDttNktnYu1G76Bt2/s1600-h/20080614nipples.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxW_RVjgFCNAHU_jZuz5q9wyiZaxw88YjN-SNaf5zNAlTXTgKjzMiaHbhyt2cdWCBcr-iWsg-SYtWJGdCXnv5nLbCp2epA8UXNGImWhxiuGidwq2Pjn7OYpK47PADFDttNktnYu1G76Bt2/s320/20080614nipples.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5212874469982649122" /></a><br />Remember that episode in Sex and the City where the ladies tried on fake nipples to entice others? Yeah. Our Mary, sadly, lacks much in the bosom department nowadays, but she still has them nipples, by God! And she's going to show them off! Too bad the puke rose color does nothing for her and she has no clue how to use a shawl. Ask Marie, darling, the French are impossibly chic with their scarves.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-90430000573339079622008-06-10T04:16:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:02.126-08:00Give me a D<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSBP0bzFnXWbaCCrqYbANrcJ2IaDT40_EwH6nHTTB7jxefwxRyKQU6LCQTwvwp59xnc7i0_uln9TL2DwuepeAyG9xtc9g4pZ3X8NtXTX4DS8_nqY1b7bLx2ir0IdUwswoRgoybwo-50QP5/s1600-h/frederikin2008.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSBP0bzFnXWbaCCrqYbANrcJ2IaDT40_EwH6nHTTB7jxefwxRyKQU6LCQTwvwp59xnc7i0_uln9TL2DwuepeAyG9xtc9g4pZ3X8NtXTX4DS8_nqY1b7bLx2ir0IdUwswoRgoybwo-50QP5/s320/frederikin2008.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5210402181618796770" /></a><br />But is it D for Drinking too much?<br /><br />D for Drugs?<br /><br />or<br /><br />D for Divorce?<br /><br />Because Frederik didn't use to look like this.<br /><br />Or is it the knowledge that his wife is reviled as a gold-digger and useless lump who is only good for shopping and putting her size 9 feet up? The knowledge that his wife, his partner in life, has absolutely no relationship with his children can weigh on a man who realizes he has chosen poorly, who realizes that getting pressured into this big a decision should not have been allowed and that he should have grown a pair and not let himself be pulled around by a tanned fatty who seemed a "natural, normal girl" but has now become a robot with a stick up her ass. <br /><br />Maybe it is the knowledge that his children do not begin to measure to other children their age, that the unwavering dull expression in their faces is due to the most oppressive presence of all, that of their dictatorial, domineering, perfectionist mother. A mother to whom weight is a sin. A mother who cannot seem to coax a smile out of her children. A mother who carries her children like Paris Hilton carries her dog. For show. For the cameras. A mother more worried about showing her best side than wiping off her children's chins. <br /><br />The knowledge that he has chosen as poor a mother as his own mother was must be awful for Frederik. Margrethe was a cold mother and what has he chosen, the Ice Queen of all Ice Queens, the worth successor to Margrethe Who Could Not Relate to Children. <br /><br />Too bad, Frederik, seems you've ruined the next generation already.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-38368825061571842462008-05-30T12:50:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:03.239-08:00We're going to make it funky<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9e1ucCYtie_m-OIL8ALdFONx8PBboSJ2eLyllLzM39MTZsFq0yLfSfUpbC5PcmYAf2lrj6s-zHvOqr3jOvfgLq9b3UBixnDbHGo6y4VUE5Z60LLN8WzfknW4yBI4pp_wZeKAHh3XV7fxa/s1600-h/b.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9e1ucCYtie_m-OIL8ALdFONx8PBboSJ2eLyllLzM39MTZsFq0yLfSfUpbC5PcmYAf2lrj6s-zHvOqr3jOvfgLq9b3UBixnDbHGo6y4VUE5Z60LLN8WzfknW4yBI4pp_wZeKAHh3XV7fxa/s320/b.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367587439084290" /></a><br />in honor of Crown Prince Frederik the Sad's birthday with a retrospective of his last few years. You know, the ones since he married Mary the Blooddrinker, so we can see just how happy the chap has been since he met the succubus.<br /><br />Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Lionel Richie.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF-IJsktKT2_K3BM-Ai-JMEG_tfLLtoa74C6j1UcxELCPtcDPlR0oyMdHue_h-YiFKq8vSoOO3QmyrGRJiBHZlirIm1V5d_Z4NDl7PHApNtTUSJ-mW7xgQp7NS7TbBKbTF3JWgpC38Dkfx/s1600-h/a.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF-IJsktKT2_K3BM-Ai-JMEG_tfLLtoa74C6j1UcxELCPtcDPlR0oyMdHue_h-YiFKq8vSoOO3QmyrGRJiBHZlirIm1V5d_Z4NDl7PHApNtTUSJ-mW7xgQp7NS7TbBKbTF3JWgpC38Dkfx/s320/a.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206365200736689378" /></a><br />Well, my friends, the time has come<br />To raise the roof and have some fun<br />Throw away the work to be done<br />Let the music play on<br />(play on, play on)<br />Everbody sing, everybody dance<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRafok2E13s0vDd7C2M8o0ZRQCyekLlJezHaYJsq6UR9CFTsbmjhOYTEOdTTGT6MV0qiFbt2xg66Pa0CuAsFdJ3K3TICgnbR37n_6B9tDpedxPjwABZhDD1lPugs-RFiLadIUusCpOcV0O/s1600-h/i.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRafok2E13s0vDd7C2M8o0ZRQCyekLlJezHaYJsq6UR9CFTsbmjhOYTEOdTTGT6MV0qiFbt2xg66Pa0CuAsFdJ3K3TICgnbR37n_6B9tDpedxPjwABZhDD1lPugs-RFiLadIUusCpOcV0O/s320/i.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367980490647026" /></a><br />Lose yourself in wild romance<br />We’re going to party<br />Karamu, fiesta, forever<br />Come on and sing along!<br />We’re going to party<br />Karamu, fiesta, forever<br />Come onand sing along!<br />We’re going to party<br />Karamu, fiesta, forever<br />Come on and sing along!<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4LE19TtPrhq05rHH9ijSAW3tjZQNJhhmWHb6c7NtFB2QSRfMeox1waadyxuzaKpQG0fv3TVCBwFQU7fFELi5LQkLnloUNFOaNPzLe7F3BwY_BPjORXEhpAhZNVrLy9i7_jNQ64uIyKPUc/s1600-h/h.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4LE19TtPrhq05rHH9ijSAW3tjZQNJhhmWHb6c7NtFB2QSRfMeox1waadyxuzaKpQG0fv3TVCBwFQU7fFELi5LQkLnloUNFOaNPzLe7F3BwY_BPjORXEhpAhZNVrLy9i7_jNQ64uIyKPUc/s320/h.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367939551535522" /></a><br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br />People dancing all in the street<br />See the rhythm all in their feet<br />Life is good wild and sweet<br />Let the music play on<br />(play on, play on)<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZy53St8dwWaE8_wy9TdcyRwLNwOOZLeUBK90OVV9kMmn07xqyqI6biMhlETfRmknr8ZSErQjx8dzBo2qhJiBWoMEK5xLPLsdWlP1oAF-yzhxXKuCe29EsuzYsP2m6AJIjFG3_-Rh0KgC6/s1600-h/g.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZy53St8dwWaE8_wy9TdcyRwLNwOOZLeUBK90OVV9kMmn07xqyqI6biMhlETfRmknr8ZSErQjx8dzBo2qhJiBWoMEK5xLPLsdWlP1oAF-yzhxXKuCe29EsuzYsP2m6AJIjFG3_-Rh0KgC6/s320/g.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367898546226146" /></a><br />Feel it in your heart<br />And feel it in your soul<br />Let the music take control<br />We’re going to party<br />Liming, fiesta, forever<br />Come on and sing my song!<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie2mjlyQBvQLCtyEdDpuhiKfzInOOge-Ksp6qr_7Cw1RXEysQHhhpADMmE4TljZ71yVgXf1SGPMwuXAifreXBFk379B-VMu7Gokx4I3-_Wzp4h35nRkoyks8L0tyTIayxglevnU7GpeCMh/s1600-h/f.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie2mjlyQBvQLCtyEdDpuhiKfzInOOge-Ksp6qr_7Cw1RXEysQHhhpADMmE4TljZ71yVgXf1SGPMwuXAifreXBFk379B-VMu7Gokx4I3-_Wzp4h35nRkoyks8L0tyTIayxglevnU7GpeCMh/s320/f.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367832098704338" /></a><br />Yeah, once you get started<br />You can’t sit down<br />Come join the fun<br />It’s a merry go round<br />Everyone’s dancing<br />Their troubles away<br />Come join our party<br />See how we play!<br />Oh, yes<br />We’re going to have a party!<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long! (all night)<br />All night long!<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjib5THZectQQuc9adzsV1-CNkS-dBLBc8nRAIJW8tql6uYUT_mcHDGpYGPknQ5DhPCH7O0ZsYjl5oHytTspHYKhyphenhyphenOH7vBzvQr4WtFJUa26p6JhkboQBo7jZ5LwL4_eIZkQLrLB-ArnCIfW/s1600-h/c.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjib5THZectQQuc9adzsV1-CNkS-dBLBc8nRAIJW8tql6uYUT_mcHDGpYGPknQ5DhPCH7O0ZsYjl5oHytTspHYKhyphenhyphenOH7vBzvQr4WtFJUa26p6JhkboQBo7jZ5LwL4_eIZkQLrLB-ArnCIfW/s320/c.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367637799570674" /></a><br />Everyone you meet<br />They’re jamming in the street<br />All night long1<br />Yeah, I said, everyone you meet<br />They’re jamming in the street<br />All night long!<br />Yeah, I said, everyone you meet<br />They’re jamming in the street<br />All night long!<br />Feel good! feel good! <br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitwQGJLZ0YjLNJ5PB-dQlG-NjLjUrfn9kN1ki1f9nEtJyR9cGVL4peWdNlYWk_3ygNtwvUFEysHEfJUNjpryrVTCkiqOmMrfypQWsDSPjVI6ZnqQf9w-Ui6T-dsPR8k2rViKZiEXW-7fwN/s1600-h/e.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitwQGJLZ0YjLNJ5PB-dQlG-NjLjUrfn9kN1ki1f9nEtJyR9cGVL4peWdNlYWk_3ygNtwvUFEysHEfJUNjpryrVTCkiqOmMrfypQWsDSPjVI6ZnqQf9w-Ui6T-dsPR8k2rViKZiEXW-7fwN/s320/e.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5206367709918589090" /></a><br />and to quote the Always Fab Ab Fab - "I see no point in celebrating the fact that he's lived so BLOODY LONG."Unknownnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-85748856470043738562008-05-24T23:00:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:03.700-08:00Here comes the bogan!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirr8htRY2fReeDt5pY1T3I8Mz65d8Rp3Q1mCqucYqyCT8M3kj_xl8FSgpV2eXN3suvanjP9Ii0XH9KL_n4NpBalqtDBIHJ_Ahbvwu1X7tg4yk_lwCFik47KEZHX8B1lAuuwwtKmL5EVKoR/s1600-h/bridemary.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirr8htRY2fReeDt5pY1T3I8Mz65d8Rp3Q1mCqucYqyCT8M3kj_xl8FSgpV2eXN3suvanjP9Ii0XH9KL_n4NpBalqtDBIHJ_Ahbvwu1X7tg4yk_lwCFik47KEZHX8B1lAuuwwtKmL5EVKoR/s320/bridemary.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5204376314052621346" /></a><br />There she is! Isn't she lovely? Her radiant pale skin almost matching her pale bridal gown, the huge tiara . . . oh wait. The tiara, diamonds and rubies, doesn't go with an ice blue gown. (Not that it matters, Mary yanked it out of the vault as soon as she found out that Marie was getting a bigger (and historic) tiara than her own pitiful little wirework piece.) And oh, that's not the bride!!<br /><br />That's just the Crown Princess of Denmark attempting to overshadow the bride, Marie Cavallier, as she marries into the royal family. Tsk, tsk, Mary, I know you are a Desperate Bogan and an attention whore, but come on! <br /><br />Of course, Mary's pathetic attempts failed miserably as Marie proved to be the most radiant royal bride of recent history. Not only did she look happy and was kind to those around her, unlike Her Royal Bitchiness, but she chose a dress that suited her perfectly, suited her delicate frame, and was appropriate to the occasion. Had she not spent way too much time applying Le Self-Tanner, she would have been perfect, but the girl is human, non?<br /><br />At least Mary didn't go with her first choice:<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxwIByG0HtzUzITWHdgS2Xj7NQ5m7opIXm6BqjDByfvADE7ArwwqE9aUWI8p0qCarEShUJpjTTfIV1-VamfF1B0hnAwLwI9hEfZcyTMR4VCkLeEN_9tH2yYHt8zWzE_04vvfDUx9OT2XDM/s1600-h/bride.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxwIByG0HtzUzITWHdgS2Xj7NQ5m7opIXm6BqjDByfvADE7ArwwqE9aUWI8p0qCarEShUJpjTTfIV1-VamfF1B0hnAwLwI9hEfZcyTMR4VCkLeEN_9tH2yYHt8zWzE_04vvfDUx9OT2XDM/s320/bride.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5204451510340039730" /></a><br />which she is probably saving for when Joachim and Marie christen their first child. After all, Mary will probably still not be godmother to any royal child, so she's got to get attention somehow! She sure did her best at this wedding, waving on the red carpet like her was her debutante ball, and shooting daggers at little Felix, innocently about to fall asleep right in front of her, probably hoping he would fall on his face and she would have one less "cute royal child" to compare to her own two blank-faced dumplings.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-17779736870429265142008-05-15T01:35:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:04.122-08:00The Ice Queen in Iceland, Freddy Flirts, and STILL ANOTHER FAILED PHOTOSHOT!!!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2lgyQvPw9We3P2dW6Ltai17AXtzFYbehGj8bmoDQC_a9OGyDELdGR42vY7_B94WjCL_Zb45lYapQaQIUx2jOMAuLYH6CglNVHTbTgFqETpmLTxzGKDnWhePTJDfcGSJ3edd9FSqDxH5z-/s1600-h/20080505cantsitwell.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2lgyQvPw9We3P2dW6Ltai17AXtzFYbehGj8bmoDQC_a9OGyDELdGR42vY7_B94WjCL_Zb45lYapQaQIUx2jOMAuLYH6CglNVHTbTgFqETpmLTxzGKDnWhePTJDfcGSJ3edd9FSqDxH5z-/s320/20080505cantsitwell.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5200804614099016450" /></a><br />Damn, Mary is so freaking out about Trine Villemann's book coming out in English - so that all the girls who hate her in Australia (and everywhere else) can finally read it - that she can't even sit properly!<br /><br />I can imagine, though. While the book was only in Danish she could ignore it - not to mention she couldn't actually understand much of it, other than the words "Mary" and "Donaldson" and, oh yeah, "Frederik".<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjXidWiQZRKty3hkZpXdQCNxtgjYFHCNhyphenhyphen0Vyr23seFaFZ3uSA7y3jKbAiFizUNuKBU87ERAq-HFgQ6CNxnxKb2PGFurttHS6ZGibdFQJrwiGnTLapZfWx7h_qxFByr58G29KKzox9hUHF/s1600-h/20080505gala.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjXidWiQZRKty3hkZpXdQCNxtgjYFHCNhyphenhyphen0Vyr23seFaFZ3uSA7y3jKbAiFizUNuKBU87ERAq-HFgQ6CNxnxKb2PGFurttHS6ZGibdFQJrwiGnTLapZfWx7h_qxFByr58G29KKzox9hUHF/s320/20080505gala.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5201103741391313714" /></a><br />Just kidding. That was our Mare in Iceland, where later on she dressed in a set of curtains from her guest room and put on way too much makeup. We're talking caked on, girls, and this shapeless crap does absolutely nothing for her masculine shape. I don't know which idiot came up with this, Anja or Mary, but they deserve one between the eyes for this garbage.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.seoghoer.dk/~/media/8CA694D2B98943B1903C713379A9FC0F.ashx"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px;" src="http://www.seoghoer.dk/~/media/8CA694D2B98943B1903C713379A9FC0F.ashx" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />And check out what Se og Hor has on their cover - Freddy getting awfully close to another lass. Hmmm. Happy 4th Anniversary, Mary, here's yer li'l husband plantin' one on another filly - yee haw!<br /><br />And right as I am hitting my deadline, <a href="http://www.ppe-agency.com/show.php?zoektype=2&search=16-05-2008%20Fredensborg">more photos</a> are released for Freddy Pan's (the boy who will never grow up) 40th birthday, in which he is seen looking more pathetic than usual, having his nanny dressing him, and touching Mary in a very weird and completely asexual way. <br /><br />This has been one wonderful week, y'all!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-75183684299797974512008-04-30T02:48:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:05.650-08:00Mine was a vacation, what's your excuse?So faithful readers, as you may have noticed, I took a bit of a break here, and I noticed the Mary Mothership, AKA, Danish Royal Watchers, is taking a break, too. I had a lovely time with lovely company, thank you for asking.<br /><br />I have had people comment that Susan Moody is the person behind DRWS, I really don't think The Plump One would write such drivel, although, hey, her books are pretty darn mediocre, and so is DRWS, so it could be. <br /><br />But regarding this blog's reason for being, the newly minted Countess of Monpezat - excuse me while I laugh - is that in preparation for a divorce, so Mary will have a lifetime title? The way this self-serving family acts, they remind me of the US Congress, voting on their own salary raises. Hmmm, let me think, should I vote YES on raising my salary? That's a hard one.<br /><br />In any case, let's recap the last few weeks in the life and times of our favorite piece of bogan trash, shall we?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioiqqac0caS7_SkvGIK01580gVUAXSokQVCt2jwnqhKOmI_P1oxmV2jBAMKyLdooxRJAZgp4G269QMZHiZ2NxU3V3RS3ei9MxlmyBDj5xTEVdsDZvOIwsjIzTOO1oCIM89DC_HT6NSGSmb/s1600-h/1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioiqqac0caS7_SkvGIK01580gVUAXSokQVCt2jwnqhKOmI_P1oxmV2jBAMKyLdooxRJAZgp4G269QMZHiZ2NxU3V3RS3ei9MxlmyBDj5xTEVdsDZvOIwsjIzTOO1oCIM89DC_HT6NSGSmb/s320/1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198218846927183074" /></a><br />First we have Mary being inducted into the Royal Mayestaits Acteurs at the Culture House, like other members of the DRF before her. She completely ruins the collar of that jacket with the stupid black ruffle underneath. Are we shocked? Of course not, it's Mary, capable of ruining any designer piece in a single outing, able to mix gorgeous pieces so badly that ONE wishes to throw her to the pig bin.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG6ddrtgutAXGg61_kYGWmvzdE0mgGm3-4Ra6IJc0Kws5vdhLKrK6glMe1FIjIZlSRZ3G7ZvqvuKEgbmv9kyXx3iRbKpohlp1wL8LFi_3V_iX-e1VvNI_rt8kfcnp7WhJ3RKbxFr-sesq8/s1600-h/20080325b.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG6ddrtgutAXGg61_kYGWmvzdE0mgGm3-4Ra6IJc0Kws5vdhLKrK6glMe1FIjIZlSRZ3G7ZvqvuKEgbmv9kyXx3iRbKpohlp1wL8LFi_3V_iX-e1VvNI_rt8kfcnp7WhJ3RKbxFr-sesq8/s320/20080325b.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5195084363457823378" /></a><br />Here is Your Mary, with a major bitch look on her face, looking down at an older lady who did her part for the DANISH RESISTANCE. Can you imagine? What has the world come to when a social climbing, gold digging piece of trash can be a snob to such a heroic figure?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0vua5c2P7Z_kC2UCUHMDqYQkFAgLl0ZdNdfOYQaHIjglEdzcQmBx10f7D5uWMMuXVqKAwaj7oD1pTy1NSlDV3atCQHHWKDyIgm_J9GiDA0SKZiQFosTbW8igAsLJeV7-Vx4skTUYywXdT/s1600-h/20080401cheapcopyBB14.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0vua5c2P7Z_kC2UCUHMDqYQkFAgLl0ZdNdfOYQaHIjglEdzcQmBx10f7D5uWMMuXVqKAwaj7oD1pTy1NSlDV3atCQHHWKDyIgm_J9GiDA0SKZiQFosTbW8igAsLJeV7-Vx4skTUYywXdT/s320/20080401cheapcopyBB14.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5195085200976446114" /></a><br />Mary attempting to recerate a portrait of the beloved Ingrid for Billed Bladet. The camera whore Princess Mary is nothing but a cheap copy. A cheap copy who loves to pose for magazines, but is hard pressed to give interviews because SHE STILL CAN'T SPEAK DANISH WELL!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid3yuwtqbpk_FjwlMGhTLrmcgNZ4fAgbC-repeCa8KQ4YKRpz5gpFQ9yYfQXlxbeKSpo8HRhB2EAl4ERWiy0rbePVnKMqBw7itKSG7JwVLZqVXNhYBpS51GX3KdAFH8JM-PJJBWqcTVykl/s1600-h/2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid3yuwtqbpk_FjwlMGhTLrmcgNZ4fAgbC-repeCa8KQ4YKRpz5gpFQ9yYfQXlxbeKSpo8HRhB2EAl4ERWiy0rbePVnKMqBw7itKSG7JwVLZqVXNhYBpS51GX3KdAFH8JM-PJJBWqcTVykl/s320/2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198219529826983154" /></a><br />Mary looking awful after a laser treatment. She really should have done it when she had a few days before venturing out to scare people like that. The raw scarring, topped with a kilo of foundation give her a burn victim's mask look, although her crows' feet still look pretty bad.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCgrqdQVKFSIHaEAw1JQEYI3jLsikdp8UqgNhdaIHc4CclMgJwAYsGGB6TDp4viJ9cf4mhn1cWb7tPuKdCaM_UKPxWSHqm_KOMzOnIbNyP623nufmTw8YfpgHNXB6-zxVdatBewKFs79HP/s1600-h/20080410shapeless.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCgrqdQVKFSIHaEAw1JQEYI3jLsikdp8UqgNhdaIHc4CclMgJwAYsGGB6TDp4viJ9cf4mhn1cWb7tPuKdCaM_UKPxWSHqm_KOMzOnIbNyP623nufmTw8YfpgHNXB6-zxVdatBewKFs79HP/s320/20080410shapeless.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5195088520986165954" /></a><br />Mary gets it wrong again - I said I loved the TV show Shameless because hottie James McAvoy is in it. But Mary heard "Shapeless" and thus wore this awful ensemble that does absolutely nothing for her masculine figure. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL15MzbSdq2rDdTmCtrgDZ5FhSf1B9BNR_zDBW3te2IoMiR7X4rwY8kkkRujmdRcCpWUwTkz1L3v_8v9y-BuKZKLNFP_jbg2MbXTULfotIstMwKvicWvL_UvyGPJEWZn2Qr61U5VlvdsJh/s1600-h/3.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL15MzbSdq2rDdTmCtrgDZ5FhSf1B9BNR_zDBW3te2IoMiR7X4rwY8kkkRujmdRcCpWUwTkz1L3v_8v9y-BuKZKLNFP_jbg2MbXTULfotIstMwKvicWvL_UvyGPJEWZn2Qr61U5VlvdsJh/s320/3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198220058107960578" /></a><br />I think Mary needs help learning how to walk as well as with her clothes, because what the fuck is this??? <br /><br />Mary and co. in Miami, where she takes advantage of a giddy Frederik, happy to have gotten 4th place after many poor results with Nanoq, and after plying him with much booze, stages a lovey dovey kiss that has the Mary fangirls set changing their panties. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1jgjHJ9G5vzc_y1WmK37h1NikzZ43M4Zw2KljiqSorDMPKa13yS7_B0B0Q9IBVlviSzQOaz0s8Zg7XMy0nTURkeo4eBDQbLQ2wJBrsVb0G1hXkOysIrC7AY-QxmqDevpkLyDcVWXHYBd5/s1600-h/4.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1jgjHJ9G5vzc_y1WmK37h1NikzZ43M4Zw2KljiqSorDMPKa13yS7_B0B0Q9IBVlviSzQOaz0s8Zg7XMy0nTURkeo4eBDQbLQ2wJBrsVb0G1hXkOysIrC7AY-QxmqDevpkLyDcVWXHYBd5/s320/4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198220423180180754" /></a><br />A badly staged photoshoot of IsNOTabella's first birthday "celebration" with the family. Mary, overdoing the smiles (so soon after the laser treatment, Mary?) showing Christian's crotch to the world, and Frederik, in another awful striped sweater. This man wants to be the next Bert Convy, and if you go look up who that is, you will be very scared. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb068nixnx1xYHsu6X7QqbJ9wIdULQTXCM2d5REeY9ablBaMKdVxinkPWvhzk3L_FfqGblsi8vgUvKempMZNLYq-5H_hKjCWV_QXqLtkcsAJROOJLGe6Ih2tzDfMCsgTVaf3M8f4he5F9R/s1600-h/20080428.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb068nixnx1xYHsu6X7QqbJ9wIdULQTXCM2d5REeY9ablBaMKdVxinkPWvhzk3L_FfqGblsi8vgUvKempMZNLYq-5H_hKjCWV_QXqLtkcsAJROOJLGe6Ih2tzDfMCsgTVaf3M8f4he5F9R/s320/20080428.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5195092163118433010" /></a><br />And here is Mary, attempting a daring decolletage for the mammary-challenged. Sadly, delicate fluttery sleeves are not good on massive bogan shoulders such as hers. Good color, as compared to all the puke and pus shades she usually sports, but bad style. Who the fuck is choosing this crap? Is it Mary or her much touted and grossly overpaid stylist? Because, whoever it is, Mary looks like crap.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1w299orhoOnfSbJ-EPNPDfzaK6jmmznpY93R1rX1ONyr-8hoLfBHJKAEcCqZDXVDhaAzfRfkNFAPLhL9lSGOq50UJ1VtCU6i5JWr_7DmPNTkGH02dC9JGUPTj-e-kGyJUOKBMffGk9Gz8/s1600-h/5.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1w299orhoOnfSbJ-EPNPDfzaK6jmmznpY93R1rX1ONyr-8hoLfBHJKAEcCqZDXVDhaAzfRfkNFAPLhL9lSGOq50UJ1VtCU6i5JWr_7DmPNTkGH02dC9JGUPTj-e-kGyJUOKBMffGk9Gz8/s320/5.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198221316533378338" /></a><br />After going home in her blue dress, Mary seems to have had some major Botox injections because she looks like a mannequin (and not a good one) in this latest appearance. The Egyptian style kohl eye makeup is truly horrendous in both color and application, and she can't seem to move the upper part of her face. <br /><br />So, my darling readers, these are but a few of the lowlights of my favorite ex-chubbette's goings on. She gets more and more pathetic every day and if the rumors I am hearing are correct, there is a good reason for that.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-30344467427628669442008-03-12T14:28:00.000-07:002008-11-13T03:40:06.056-08:00This week on the Bogan show<strong>Freddy loses his wedding ring<br />Mary poses in combat gear . . . again<br />A new royal portrait is unveiled, to much, much acclaim</strong><br /><br />So, does this count as a "turning point" kind of week? Let's hope so, and let's hope that this week's news are just the beginning of The Incredibly Snobby Bogan's downfall.<br /><br />Apparently, Prince Braindead lost his wedding ring while diving. Stories abound of Mary greatly saddened because this represented "their love" - ahem. Puh-leeze. You know she's about to pull a Diana and consult a psychic to see what this Really Means. Honey, I can tell you that for free. If he didn't care enough to take it off before diving - if that is, indeed, where he lost it - who can say how much it really means to him? Of course, he has a replacement one already, can't let him out without the reminder of his Worst Mistake Ever!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBPSuy8zDRwja1SO24LZRrvDuGxYf7JA_ovtOMmEBIqZBaONlzGQmg-AB_R-npEw4mvNsOtTj4SS9CjrpC701bITA847FYmm3JKwOCNyXncvOdm7zofI0h94vroWY0noVWaoLSH3KaSZYg/s1600-h/20080312a.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBPSuy8zDRwja1SO24LZRrvDuGxYf7JA_ovtOMmEBIqZBaONlzGQmg-AB_R-npEw4mvNsOtTj4SS9CjrpC701bITA847FYmm3JKwOCNyXncvOdm7zofI0h94vroWY0noVWaoLSH3KaSZYg/s320/20080312a.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5176971542941470418" /></a><br />We are treated of this most awesome photograph of Mary The Fighting Princess, in full camo makeup - which is slightly less makeup than she wears daily - and STILL posing, her lips slightly parted and halfway to pursing. <br /><br />What can I say? A bogan is a bogan is a bogan. And Mary will never stop being a bogan. Although that headgear is better than that awful purple hat she wore to the unveiling of her portrait. That thing needs to be burned, now.<br /><br />Poor Caroline Heering should be given a raise for having to go along with this joke. And Per Thornit and Anja, aka, "The Most Useless Stylist in the World", need to be fired.<br /><br />And now onto our next item:<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSPGbQkq4szoAVRWqlTBmjKZyjsiM2tIA4ji2mzZd06zgcPKhJUlKx5-zt79-7jYu_ANAE74vsXO4zF0LPp9-p7iOBlVw_jB59OUF_Lt1hGJ1WrheA-3XlMvZ2eFZ1Fs9RfhAc1hG8pQZd/s1600-h/20080309Danish%252BAussie%252BRoyals.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSPGbQkq4szoAVRWqlTBmjKZyjsiM2tIA4ji2mzZd06zgcPKhJUlKx5-zt79-7jYu_ANAE74vsXO4zF0LPp9-p7iOBlVw_jB59OUF_Lt1hGJ1WrheA-3XlMvZ2eFZ1Fs9RfhAc1hG8pQZd/s320/20080309Danish%252BAussie%252BRoyals.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5176972444884602594" /></a><br />Can you feel the veins on Mary's forehead swelling with righteous indignation? Can you hear her breathing . . . suddenly . . . stop upon seeing this glorious image? Can you feel her clenched man hands as she grabs the newspaper and throws it into the bin? <br /><br />I can - and it's pretty!!!<br /><br />Everything Mary has fought for, her carefully altered image, her stupidly gilded CV, her white skin, her new taste for Prada, everything she has done in the last 7 years is now GONE GONE GONE because this is the real Mary in that portrait. A vulgar chubbette who refuses to let go of her Aussie connections (i.e. Uggs) and despite her professed love of animals, uses them for decoration. I also love the depiction of Christian, looking as stupid as ever.<br /><br />Here it is, Mary, your worst nightmare come to life. And you know what the worst part is? <br /><br />That it was painted at all?<br />That it WON the prize?<br />That it has been printed in the Australian and Danish media?<br />No.<br /><br />The worst part is that people get it. They laugh at it, and you, because it is the real you. Underneath the fake accent you are still that girl, and you always will be.<br /><br />Now go cry in your Foster's.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-37434262942232805722008-03-05T04:41:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:06.701-08:00Another trip to the Bogan Homeworld<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHPxogy3145X0Lcs0QgbxryQoK7Zoj-pqmsCAio81jObw-D1rndAtUdmx2zOmjUHZEJ3L3WDwwvWbHkHLe8LUJiq7xtolh8reo33oCHq1hh-3cOwTcPBsjaD384JZeR8io3eqOsFCc1Gp1/s1600-h/2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHPxogy3145X0Lcs0QgbxryQoK7Zoj-pqmsCAio81jObw-D1rndAtUdmx2zOmjUHZEJ3L3WDwwvWbHkHLe8LUJiq7xtolh8reo33oCHq1hh-3cOwTcPBsjaD384JZeR8io3eqOsFCc1Gp1/s320/2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174347362989472018" /></a><br />After the May nuptials of Prince Joachim and Marie Cavallier, after which will follow much attention on the new Princess of Denmark, and after much publicized confirmation that no one in America gives a shit about who Mary is, as seen by the complete lack of US media coverage of the disastrous trip to New York, our Bogan Princess is headed to the place where about seventeen people still give a shit about her - Tasmania!!!<br /><br />I understand, I mean, that's seventeen more than in America - and I'm not talking about drooling fangirls, I'm talking about the media, press, magazines, TV, none of which give a flying fuck about this chest-rubbing gold digger turned Prada Princess.<br /><br />After the Olympics in Beijing, where the Stuttering Fool will attempt to make a statement with his presence (well, he sure can't make it with words because the moron can't even talk) about his suitability for an IOC post, he will join Mary and the two Future Emotional Wrecks, a.k.a. Christian and IsNOTabella, who will leave China and its even-more-difficult-than-Danish language in order to have a Private Vacation in Australia.<br /><br />Let's take a tour down memory lane and see what happened the last time this self-centered cow went to Tasmania, shall we?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIiYHkj3gPx_2RvWBe4iqJTDebGV5qvHI1iQ3YM0n3RKIl9jYpXPFDBMPa2BJ_N2LWBOxUUuQg73ohzDXth4RbvI-wpFToUu4Fw8P_V7mrQOIAf5xO2OkG3pg_hRSDfm1pVR5mo-SfBxWg/s1600-h/20061121.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIiYHkj3gPx_2RvWBe4iqJTDebGV5qvHI1iQ3YM0n3RKIl9jYpXPFDBMPa2BJ_N2LWBOxUUuQg73ohzDXth4RbvI-wpFToUu4Fw8P_V7mrQOIAf5xO2OkG3pg_hRSDfm1pVR5mo-SfBxWg/s320/20061121.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174347861205678370" /></a><br />Mary happily waving at the Australian media, her best friends in the world, because they report every burp and fart of hers.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizpkl-lb1FKNaL6YQ19rct2uPkcXpJu1aVkGeEkMp2uDafYAZTzIeJTDdp-qiVO_kDVdUePm0cSx3RqoekyPiyZ5b9TDtIM0YLjis4EehMpl9tdD_i_7kVEExWkucywtMRhtV8ECnPoaZZ/s1600-h/20061122.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizpkl-lb1FKNaL6YQ19rct2uPkcXpJu1aVkGeEkMp2uDafYAZTzIeJTDdp-qiVO_kDVdUePm0cSx3RqoekyPiyZ5b9TDtIM0YLjis4EehMpl9tdD_i_7kVEExWkucywtMRhtV8ECnPoaZZ/s320/20061122.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174348660069595442" /></a><br />Mary stood by the house's GLASS WALLS until a reporter came up and of course, Mary felt dutifully obliged to answer. God forbid she do something as rude as she did at the Melbourne Cup, when she was still the "girlfriend" - as I recall, a reporter asked her who made her dress and she said, "a Danish designer"; when asked which designer, she snapped, "just write it's a Danish designer, ok?" Filthy rude bitch, what a big fucking sense of entitlement she took on, didn't she?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH_fNhSaIvkn4eFb4AcM1fb8DTycX_7Z2OSgi4Pg4qNAtLM9C7A-4F9MChhIEg2pY9p5HYPatYCc8mt73HtxfUj32zgKkOLzqm9VNpMyr31vwDh5KiG_U_Ua7g10GFxcOULyMQBLpCp5Wy/s1600-h/20061124c.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH_fNhSaIvkn4eFb4AcM1fb8DTycX_7Z2OSgi4Pg4qNAtLM9C7A-4F9MChhIEg2pY9p5HYPatYCc8mt73HtxfUj32zgKkOLzqm9VNpMyr31vwDh5KiG_U_Ua7g10GFxcOULyMQBLpCp5Wy/s320/20061124c.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174349321494559042" /></a><br />Appeared decked out in her celeb-gear - full makeup, Marianne Dulong jewelry, huge attention-whore sunglasses, and celeb-accessory Christian - to go to Salamanca place, which had more people per square foot than anywhere else, so Mary was guaranteed tons of people whipping out their camera phones to take photos of the "Aussie Princess".<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF8sIJrfaknA2cMD7UF9xwlHfdhe4oCJRS5JL0E50oDzhoif1mtNnLxyd6vqG4lI1dQdLAeS5g21ak_zM5YdbRs0jsTOrFsZUzfvE9L6Os0ar1hwqnMPibl7fvXKAFlOX5ejqEOcmCBVbl/s1600-h/20061125b.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF8sIJrfaknA2cMD7UF9xwlHfdhe4oCJRS5JL0E50oDzhoif1mtNnLxyd6vqG4lI1dQdLAeS5g21ak_zM5YdbRs0jsTOrFsZUzfvE9L6Os0ar1hwqnMPibl7fvXKAFlOX5ejqEOcmCBVbl/s320/20061125b.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5174350571330042194" /></a><br />She checked out the stalls, making sure to take her time and let everyone tell anyone who hadn't heard, that "Our Mary" was doing shopping here!!!<br /><br />Of course, the news was "leaked" on danish tabloids NOW, i.e. months before, because lord forbid Mary go anywhere without everyone being alerted. Many royals manage truly private vacations and while they do speak to the press like Mary & co. did at the zoo, they mean it when they travel privately. The press is not alerted, they do not pose in front of glass walls, and they do not go to the most crowded open air shopping area in the state. <br /><br />With the Danish media being critical of Mary's spending, lack of Danish skills, and purpose, and more and more people in Australia being sick and tired of being force-fed stories about Mary, I look forward to this trip in August. I forecast lots of attention whoring opportunities and much bogan posing.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-27133179602532921252008-03-02T03:33:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:06.854-08:00You go, Mads!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiXc4RvubEvHwt5IJw2mUTfiHKPANW3gdCNbL7BBQwhxxMKzIuExZuoxiGz8C49QHqpsDkCBIYYeBfrTLVSQHp8DxKJgf75NjgHxkXgkMCCXDCrDw0EED5hfkVHYiBQlfemh1eUnasaqaG/s1600-h/30.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiXc4RvubEvHwt5IJw2mUTfiHKPANW3gdCNbL7BBQwhxxMKzIuExZuoxiGz8C49QHqpsDkCBIYYeBfrTLVSQHp8DxKJgf75NjgHxkXgkMCCXDCrDw0EED5hfkVHYiBQlfemh1eUnasaqaG/s320/30.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198774143303911746" /></a><br />It's proof - as if we needed any more proof, but hey, Mary keeps handing it to us, right? - that Mary blabbed a lot of bullshit in her early interviews that about modernizing the monarchy, as seen in one very telling episode just a few days ago.<br /><br />While receiving Mads and Marie in the spirit of her Rare Diagnosis charity, it was revealed that Mary's staff had instructed the children as to how to behave in Her Regal Boganness's presence and to address her as Your Royal Highness.<br /><br />What a fucking bitch. To have the balls to tell these kids, who have more dignity and grace in their little fingers than Mary will ever have draped in diamonds, that they need to address her a certain way, is not only arrogant but defies the whole "modernizing the monarchy" comment. I am sure the kids know she's a fucking Princess, did they really need to be told how to behave? <br /><br />I find this latest stunt disgusting, and it brings back memories of the much-maligned but will-never-be-equaled Diana. Say what you will about her temperament, media whoring, etc. but Diana had a gift for people, making them at ease and concentrating on them as if nothing else existed, that this piece of shit Tassie sack of garbage never will.<br /><br />Shame on you, Mary, shame on you for being such an insecure snob. Shame on you for demanding the privileges of your position, which should be gracefully ignored in the face of such poise and sweetness as being in the presence of these two children.<br /><br />Thankfully, the litle boy, Mads, got his own when Mary asked him, of all fucking things this bitch could ask him, what he thought she looked like.<br /><br />His response? <br /><br />"Ordinary."<br /><br />Yes, Mary, even a blind child can see that you are an ordinary woman. Draped in Prada you may be, but your faults are shouted to the world by your every move and every word.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-90697016976807813752008-02-29T01:31:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:07.149-08:00Fire Anja!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkhkr82-t3eVRuAVutbrPk-NMrENWuHSTFNxErWLxM2s4Uiqhb-Fg6iPf_piqtmsVsbcYyCi2wnqIBs-JQgTCfZb5kpA9yVGdgE3qGMLCnt5E5-TUfDEEGfWJNeS9ZGQHeNGKbwQ1wdhiP/s1600-h/20080228.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkhkr82-t3eVRuAVutbrPk-NMrENWuHSTFNxErWLxM2s4Uiqhb-Fg6iPf_piqtmsVsbcYyCi2wnqIBs-JQgTCfZb5kpA9yVGdgE3qGMLCnt5E5-TUfDEEGfWJNeS9ZGQHeNGKbwQ1wdhiP/s320/20080228.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5172574147834326610" /></a><br />This week our intrepid Bogan Princess coordinates - I use the term loosely because this bitch couldn't put clothes together if her life depended on it - a feather/fur atrocity along with a horrible and not flattering sleeveless silk turtleneck scarf something or other, and attempts to make an outfit with greys, blues, browns, taupes, and just about every other color that crosses her bogan eyes.<br /><br />But hey, the top is Prada so it's got to be flattering, right? Label whore Mary doesn't get that sleeveless on her pre-op transsexual physique is not a good thing. And before you, dear readers, get all liberal on me, let me state that one of my dearest and nearest is a pre-op transsexual and she is the first person to agree with me that Mary Just Doesn't Get It!!! We're not voting for McCain on this blog, I'm just illustrating a point. If Mary would only spend one hour with my dear friend, she would learn some wonderful makeup and fashion tips that would serve her for the rest of her royal life. But my friend's too good for Mary, so nyah.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiO5yxwxhhDgOwOMuj5GuCYFjo0c29jQEePo3N5DZNcNkynKnG0mhrnS554-LOyqj48YlT3BkMRCuDrGpZN3QScDn2J7YHPYLW4HNSuLZ5BWe6fFIPXvagvcvc5mJpqdlzktcMPTtaeDk-c/s1600-h/200502prada_costume2005febr.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiO5yxwxhhDgOwOMuj5GuCYFjo0c29jQEePo3N5DZNcNkynKnG0mhrnS554-LOyqj48YlT3BkMRCuDrGpZN3QScDn2J7YHPYLW4HNSuLZ5BWe6fFIPXvagvcvc5mJpqdlzktcMPTtaeDk-c/s320/200502prada_costume2005febr.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5172574667525369442" /></a><br />Mary needs to learn to KISS - Keep It Simple, Stupid. She is wearing a charcoal grey coat, ugly shiny blue slacks, the same from that movie methinks, with this Prada shirt from her visit to the EU, which would be lovely on a dainty lass like me, who doesn't have the shoulders of a linebacker. But on Mary, let's just say, that it gives creedence to those rumours about the men of the DRF having rather "out there" tastes. You'd think Mary would choose one of the main colors, i.e. grey or blue, for her leatherwear (purse and shoes) but no. Our dear bogan imbecile chooses a reddish brown pair of size 9 shoes and a taupe-ish bag. And while, granted, the Prada top has some brown in it, it's far enough away to be completely pointless.<br /><br />Furthermore, the feather laden coat AND the scarf ties are too much together. Whoever put this craptastic outfit together needs to be fired. If it was the much ballyhooed Anja, stylist extraordinaire who always looks like she's constipated, she needs to be sent packing NOW. And hey, if it's Mary, well, a ticket back to Tassie seems compensation enough for all the damage this moron has done to my sensitive and fashion-discerning eyes.<br /><br />Happy Leap Year! Here's to hoping Mary's not around by the next one!!!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-78344880822365814162008-02-22T01:20:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:07.897-08:00Yet Another Failed Photoshoot<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirMVZdrCrEGV0BCoMzYiAdO8-J9QMmOZMou-GyDk7aXEsxeJi7bMKjVRnNGpRZcJcloRrF-FHr-0YPmLiNiuw5TEh_mRra1AnHB_cJudyDSGQppqTaiMj7uS3txnS0KfOL2HSnSrMnl3Y6/s1600-h/20080216p.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirMVZdrCrEGV0BCoMzYiAdO8-J9QMmOZMou-GyDk7aXEsxeJi7bMKjVRnNGpRZcJcloRrF-FHr-0YPmLiNiuw5TEh_mRra1AnHB_cJudyDSGQppqTaiMj7uS3txnS0KfOL2HSnSrMnl3Y6/s320/20080216p.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5169842076991935410" /></a><br />This has been quite a week for Mary, who started out in a horrifically mismatched outfit that even the brain-damaged sugarboarders couldn't love. This is proof of how a perfectly nice dress, like the navy blue velvet here, is completely wrecked by Mary/her stylist - the stupid capelet, the semiprecious gemstone necklace along with the society matron diamond earrings, and the harsh, harsh makeup with the 80s Texas socialite hairdo. Man, where to begin?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipce6Vdnfws2o_Fd7TdT9ZWHPQ0ArTiraYWtY8WuERP8mhmr94O1LsJ4PsECtQEEBmHuVuRldckfNFNCEEfoWzGi8XlNcKUBN6vlSJw5-lSiDEFNv5HJF9chifjDBRTsKX5oaP7ssSHW7u/s1600-h/30.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipce6Vdnfws2o_Fd7TdT9ZWHPQ0ArTiraYWtY8WuERP8mhmr94O1LsJ4PsECtQEEBmHuVuRldckfNFNCEEfoWzGi8XlNcKUBN6vlSJw5-lSiDEFNv5HJF9chifjDBRTsKX5oaP7ssSHW7u/s320/30.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198773636497770786" /></a><br />Then we move on to one of the most contrived photosessions in history, and considering this is Mary we're talking about, that's saying a lot. Her BFFs Mads and Marie, the little girl who so horrified Mary that she stood a full five feet away last time, visit Mary at Amalienborg. "Damn, now they know where I live!" Mary thinks. Aw, here is Mary the moral support icon, dressed to the nines and coiffed to perfection to hang out with her BFFs. Well, considering that Amber is bogan-non-grata and no one else likes Mary, these two kids may be Mary's only friends. And hey, they can't go anywhere, so they're kind of stuck aren't they?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOQcDEz3idTPjj11vukZrV0GOOsk4_2fz7hTA7uUgFBdG9rO3poZFpqIJNX3cLJV5MvIuzFYvNJqvnPn_03opcV_SlIfkKdIdXqapWNAD7OuEYXR5OvHGuG6gA0WJ0cje_lOPYLkRjSMpg/s1600-h/20080218snow1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOQcDEz3idTPjj11vukZrV0GOOsk4_2fz7hTA7uUgFBdG9rO3poZFpqIJNX3cLJV5MvIuzFYvNJqvnPn_03opcV_SlIfkKdIdXqapWNAD7OuEYXR5OvHGuG6gA0WJ0cje_lOPYLkRjSMpg/s320/20080218snow1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5169845250972767202" /></a><br />Last but not least, we have the photosession in Verbier, with Christian the Severely Manic Snowball Thrower and IsNOTabella the Ugly Pudding that Gets Passed Around. Mary can't understand what Frederik says and he has to translate for her. Then again, Mary's people go around telling those she is going to meet to not make any off-the-cuff or slang-type comments because the Kronprinsesse doesn't understand Danish well enough to understand anything but the basics. Like, Ja and Mor, I am guessing. And Kroner, I am sure she understands that one. Mary looks completely disconnected from her children, and IsNOTabella, whom Mary declared quite the feisty little girl in the infamous December photosession of love, looked like a complete zero, personality wise. Meaning Mother Icon Mary doesn't even know her own children. She sure can't deal with Christian, who nearly goes off a fucking cliff while Mummy poses in the snow. "Unusually mild baby" my ass, Christian has some developmental shit going on and he could be the next <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_VII_of_Denmark">Christian VII</a>, unless Far beats him to it.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoPFq0MdogTyXbb1mqv2bfkclHuYJR_5t3-j4gwnEsoRoEqoz5y0dX3uQTbW_v0UQ9cx-QHEaOCGbr1cbkLVlhL5jNUz-EMSAZdSLS89vXWRKkWnX-kc81kxQn7oi9uyWXGswZVrQ1bXnF/s1600-h/31.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoPFq0MdogTyXbb1mqv2bfkclHuYJR_5t3-j4gwnEsoRoEqoz5y0dX3uQTbW_v0UQ9cx-QHEaOCGbr1cbkLVlhL5jNUz-EMSAZdSLS89vXWRKkWnX-kc81kxQn7oi9uyWXGswZVrQ1bXnF/s320/31.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198773735282018610" /></a><br />Also, let's note a bitchy little comment from Mary when Frederik says he's going to be 40 but is in good shape. "Are you sure about that?" says his devoted wife. Whoa. Just look at how she is looking down at him here. Just remember, Mary, if it weren't for him you'd still be doing lateral career moves and wearing ugly shoes and lycra, you stupid bitch.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-76551719329210340402008-02-04T17:01:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:08.286-08:00From the expert's mouthA good friend of mine is quite prominent in her (medical) field and she mentioned meeting up with a former colleague from school who is an expert on body language. Hmmm, I thought, might I be able to give her some photos for him to give me a quick evaluation on? Neither she nor he are into royalty, by the way, so neither knew who these people were. Furthermore, he doesn't know who I am or anything about this blog so there were no preconceived notions, as it should be. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrQq_jHE1nXQ_8KlaE3D_2DiWMgaqx2NwQxqosQa2kukJlLu4oMBIoW3xbHG_4M8pFaBoshNldjVGJ_LNuQ5lmT9PqtM61i0faZx14ivM82cMBshGecrtddkvj9Y48h7A4aKhB3B_Or0V8/s1600-h/20071221pair4.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrQq_jHE1nXQ_8KlaE3D_2DiWMgaqx2NwQxqosQa2kukJlLu4oMBIoW3xbHG_4M8pFaBoshNldjVGJ_LNuQ5lmT9PqtM61i0faZx14ivM82cMBshGecrtddkvj9Y48h7A4aKhB3B_Or0V8/s320/20071221pair4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5163303707318142370" /></a><br />The first overwhelming response this man got from the photos was, as many of us without a PhD after our name have already concluded, that Frederik is not happy. Even the smiles are not full on and are a mask for disappointment, frustration, and that general feeling many married people have of "I'll just put up with it, might as well, I'm married." Definitely not someone who is with someone he considers a partner. He is happier when it comes to his children, but even they can't make up for the sadness that is in him.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx2MtgOADIuNA_OQgAhyi7BlkhEfdqSCGfOatORnfZ0KAWr_bqewSNK_zc5AC-mLMcBRRLoH6_dpYPmBjbSf5DeZBvP31KZ2Skq2nZsYdel6-nWae3dDgSmwHpoS3buny0HPJrauihJtt1/s1600-h/2007122194.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx2MtgOADIuNA_OQgAhyi7BlkhEfdqSCGfOatORnfZ0KAWr_bqewSNK_zc5AC-mLMcBRRLoH6_dpYPmBjbSf5DeZBvP31KZ2Skq2nZsYdel6-nWae3dDgSmwHpoS3buny0HPJrauihJtt1/s320/2007122194.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5163304364448138674" /></a><br />Another remark he made that goes along with the feelings I have expressed in this post and comments that you, my lovely readers, have made, is that Mary loves the spotlight. She has gotten what she wants but has started to find it lacking, although she loves showing off what she has gotten, i.e. the husband, in the photos where she is looking at him in a faux-adoring way; the children, although she can't quite mask that they are a disappointment to her but she will use them to garner attention; her things, she wears things to show them off and show that she has them, he doesn't know anything about fashion labels on what she's wearing but the way she poses is much like a model whose job is to show the clothes. She wishes she could "make" her husband do things, this is what he got from the shots of them alone in the woods, she keeps trying to force him to pose with her and that reflects on her relationship with him. He tries to make her happy but doesn't know how (because he doesn't know her that well after all this time? Just a thought.) and is frustrated at himself.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOgMz-TKHFf5LgvTPZm-RayPmpDQ7NMmS4KeCiz7_tYK4o2-s5TEjFlW4SLhV-c-j88WIZuFW-_miS9Xy6Y19O_9ymgBfHMa6MSetjbokFhvkHBGz1k3mpfqjzd_jUkbc1ECSPo3-tiFVU/s1600-h/20071221fam3.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOgMz-TKHFf5LgvTPZm-RayPmpDQ7NMmS4KeCiz7_tYK4o2-s5TEjFlW4SLhV-c-j88WIZuFW-_miS9Xy6Y19O_9ymgBfHMa6MSetjbokFhvkHBGz1k3mpfqjzd_jUkbc1ECSPo3-tiFVU/s320/20071221fam3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5163304682275718594" /></a><br />Regarding the children, he said that Mary is the dominant person in that family and the other three (Fred and the kids) kind of cower together, he can see them three bonding as her disappointment with each of them grows and her life begins to lose its luster, and then she might find she is alone in her family because she has alienated her husband and children. <br /><br />Anyway, that's what I got. Of course, being the idiot that I am I forgot to include a wedding photo but I think that might have made it too easy for him :DUnknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-22304343853023479132008-02-02T01:45:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:09.440-08:00Compare and contrastYou know those awful assignments in school where you had to compare and contrast foreign policies or presidential records or some other nonsense that no one ever had to know about once you left your alma mater?<br /><br />Well, the good news is, you don't have to do that here! The better news is, comparing and contrasting Mary to the other Crown Princesses is ridiculously easy, just like Mary was once she saw the Black Amex.<br /><br />I'm restricting this to the current crop of Crown Princesses, commoners who have married heirs to thrones, and to those who are in Mary's age range. And I am not using proper titles but come on, this is NOT a test!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcBVQeoTDv9MRIsEZ_3W6kYc42qHkt6Wd_7sdp0FoQzv-nj3kmvvrQs0GMfe3MjvA72kY-PfvXRfrm3HLxz_s8elNnPCSidQO5KeHOvTZTwGuh9ruhSmTJMJjFAYfLD97sgQIbwsbZcIzw/s1600-h/math.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcBVQeoTDv9MRIsEZ_3W6kYc42qHkt6Wd_7sdp0FoQzv-nj3kmvvrQs0GMfe3MjvA72kY-PfvXRfrm3HLxz_s8elNnPCSidQO5KeHOvTZTwGuh9ruhSmTJMJjFAYfLD97sgQIbwsbZcIzw/s320/math.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5162423900447425858" /></a><br />Mathilde of Belgium - Let's just call her St. Mathilde and be done with it. Mathilde has a sweetness that almost makes you blind to the horrific outfits she sometimes wears. Almost. She tends to like loud prints sometimes but she has managed something truly important - to make her husband, previously seen as a dull bore, seem more human and warm. She keeps giving birth to sweet-looking children who seem happy in their environment, with their parents and with one another. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV7MDIJS_9pU2_xzLHIHHPFBg2fjGdR9JWm_NCzWLqnH8OhsAB5vYYCmL0e2aa7sAz6LNq6zOkDlFFBsHBSxLexJLUlj04ef20_ux-zGqtEuKsytXDJ9ZOB1KFmtxbUayyVXxduyDnj1mu/s1600-h/maxi.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV7MDIJS_9pU2_xzLHIHHPFBg2fjGdR9JWm_NCzWLqnH8OhsAB5vYYCmL0e2aa7sAz6LNq6zOkDlFFBsHBSxLexJLUlj04ef20_ux-zGqtEuKsytXDJ9ZOB1KFmtxbUayyVXxduyDnj1mu/s320/maxi.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5162424055066248530" /></a><br />Maxima of the Netherlands - Another one who injected life into her husband. He's still a bit of a prick, mouthing off at the press, but Maxima's contributions to the Dutch royal house is undeniable. She has an excellent relationship with her mother-in-law and with her sister-in-law Laurentien. Her fashion sense is rather out there but she has the personality to carry off most things she wears. She is warm, enthusiastic, and has embraced her new country, speaking in good Dutch at her engagement interview and mastering the language enough to be comfortable speaking of complicated subjects. Her focus on microcredit is reinforced by her background in finance, this is no Princess shooting in the dark to make herself have substance, she knows what she's talking about.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizlrIZUnZg1AGGKbZ8VNovXyHZBTKOCngHM2nejhKOr0G8jfuCjE_Noy0PUQX-tJYMOa3rn-Xyhs1oTQpH0BLxxKlDdeE0JjIRe8SrqmbXHSK6bIgzYXusyWn5UgCfXc903MWCY0ScCWQb/s1600-h/mett.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizlrIZUnZg1AGGKbZ8VNovXyHZBTKOCngHM2nejhKOr0G8jfuCjE_Noy0PUQX-tJYMOa3rn-Xyhs1oTQpH0BLxxKlDdeE0JjIRe8SrqmbXHSK6bIgzYXusyWn5UgCfXc903MWCY0ScCWQb/s320/mett.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5162424235454874978" /></a><br />Mette-Marit of Norway - The most unlikely of Princesses and the one who has been blamed for "lowering the bar" of royal marriages. A former drug-addict with an out-of-wedlock son, Mette-Marit has chosen to be the support behind her prince and usually slumps in the background, but she has focused on lending her support to the AIDS cause. Her fashion sense is usually mediocre, and she has not bothered to lose the weight of her last two pregnancies. She seems to revel in her husband (who wouldn't?) and children.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhTnMz4eVoRszNVFOdRpcvZ-aN9mQqyI5RBk0uKnEBwequlKAweJFYSvgyBmkXEyC0J2-qnri8eTxo5cGOeulFmewEpfxiPJx5XjjOfg-hdjp2FULQQNBMpUX9tIyfpxD9ojTpKVCh_s5M/s1600-h/leti.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhTnMz4eVoRszNVFOdRpcvZ-aN9mQqyI5RBk0uKnEBwequlKAweJFYSvgyBmkXEyC0J2-qnri8eTxo5cGOeulFmewEpfxiPJx5XjjOfg-hdjp2FULQQNBMpUX9tIyfpxD9ojTpKVCh_s5M/s320/leti.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5162424364303893874" /></a><br />Letizia of Spain - The former newsreader is, like Mary, a mother of two children and married in May of 2004. Letizia rose to the top of her profession and was an accomplished career woman before marrying Felipe, and although she has been kept in the back burner for a while, she has started carrying on official duties with warmth and compassion. She hasn't yet found her style, looking at times extremely matronly and seems to be addicted to black tights. <br /><br />And last, but not least, given she is the reason for this blog --<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1d58ski0P-nF7Qk2KYiinAkEpjbZPpNEPvXgX3Og6tyNX1jXMERzHjYJvHQqj_u9Sufw0rZPDD1Ck0rUxGzzJaHzvCapG7BKWjzonNtcUtdURiFr-KgZF8TKFsmDRGPI5aJNqZmIpzaTI/s1600-h/29.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1d58ski0P-nF7Qk2KYiinAkEpjbZPpNEPvXgX3Og6tyNX1jXMERzHjYJvHQqj_u9Sufw0rZPDD1Ck0rUxGzzJaHzvCapG7BKWjzonNtcUtdURiFr-KgZF8TKFsmDRGPI5aJNqZmIpzaTI/s320/29.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5198769994365503762" /></a><br />Mary of Denmark - Mary lacks the kindness that oozes out of Mathilde, the personality and vibrancy in Maxima, the humility in Mette-Marit, and the smarts in Letizia. Her only focus seems to be fashion, which fares poorly compared to microcredit or AIDS, and she lacks even the pretense of warmth, even around her husband and children. She has a cold relationship with her in-laws and even within her own birth family has been getting the evil eye, her own brother wondered aloud where she had gotten that new posh-British accent she affects lately when speaking in English. She has not mastered Danish, no matter what the sugarboarders may say, and has succeeded in plunging her husband into lower depths of despair and depression - instead of making him a better man, she has made him even more insecure and he looks forward to the days he gets to go sailing or otherwise gets to spend away from Mary. Her children are awkward creatures who sense how little they matter to their mother - they know that she gets far more excited with a new Chanel bag than with their accomplishments. She is a failure on every front and the complete lack of substance is evident every time she steps out for an engagement or opens her mouth. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3lH2WCWhhvsaumFzpdKWXVEhqJeo721ACkFR9JfJ3Ea_M3seTVoU1Gb2rlmoH61ciTSmWOZGOXXYzgK1JDiazUYRmjyWuFqzgOZBFkdTY1coi82MpqEFH6Tj9BYQjeUZsma6472kT-GQg/s1600-h/sipa_00478989_000005.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3lH2WCWhhvsaumFzpdKWXVEhqJeo721ACkFR9JfJ3Ea_M3seTVoU1Gb2rlmoH61ciTSmWOZGOXXYzgK1JDiazUYRmjyWuFqzgOZBFkdTY1coi82MpqEFH6Tj9BYQjeUZsma6472kT-GQg/s320/sipa_00478989_000005.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5162424909764740498" /></a><br />In this election year, I wish I could vote for Mary to be sent back to Australia. That's what they used to do with consorts that didn't measure up, sent them back to their country of birth. Since Mary has failed to modernize the monarchy as she preached in one of her stupid interviews, I suggest Queen Margrethe uses the opportunity to do as her ancestors did and get rid of this useless woman. Set her up in a nice house in Oz where she can be the celebrity she's always wanted to be, give her a clothing allowance and chances to visit her children, and be done with her.<br /><br />It is what is best for the DRF, for Crown Prince Frederik, and for those two (three?) children.<br /><br />And yes, for all of you wondering, I have it from an inside source that Mary did have a nose job.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6961948162273650407.post-88398447829329286392008-01-25T21:21:00.000-08:002008-11-13T03:40:09.902-08:00When there is no peril in the fight, there is no glory in the triumph<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2bCgBErUavwX-0EgJf0GqpRqUTXpCQFaf0FOkw6gIv6sEhZyNHJYcgYh1Q3iqbFF2HF0kiVZyICOe-oQu07phT1jM-hzQ7Vv-H1lDWSpdDMgO8KQXI512n3SNHARpmsCuIr_TQjUB7CBd/s1600-h/2008011802.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2bCgBErUavwX-0EgJf0GqpRqUTXpCQFaf0FOkw6gIv6sEhZyNHJYcgYh1Q3iqbFF2HF0kiVZyICOe-oQu07phT1jM-hzQ7Vv-H1lDWSpdDMgO8KQXI512n3SNHARpmsCuIr_TQjUB7CBd/s320/2008011802.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159484480664618258" /></a><br />That is a quote by A. Alvarez that I found quite pertinent to the last barrage of shit coming from the Kronprinsparret PR office. Meaning, this appalling and unintentionally-hilarious set of photographs of Mary in combat gear.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnbAe7QGklfUtwuqe1tw61zUXLsg8y0dxRxPtaGsCTXQ7LC7lHNU5yc23asotRjdYWTXvv3DzB_3CzOXxJwhJtyFdYWvq8yL9ku729xZO-yvGDwXW8aGlTgufLgw6kJiNHFvHqeQ5N37NV/s1600-h/2008011804.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnbAe7QGklfUtwuqe1tw61zUXLsg8y0dxRxPtaGsCTXQ7LC7lHNU5yc23asotRjdYWTXvv3DzB_3CzOXxJwhJtyFdYWvq8yL9ku729xZO-yvGDwXW8aGlTgufLgw6kJiNHFvHqeQ5N37NV/s320/2008011804.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159484704002917666" /></a><br />While the Mary-creams-my-panties set gushes over how good Mary looks in this outfit and how they, too, would wear pearl earrings with their camo clothes (I believe it, considering how stupid they are), the ones of us with an actual brain mass can see that while the reign of the former PR boss could be labeled "too little, too late" this new boss's reign is already earning the title of "too much, too soon".<br /><br />First of all, as insulting as it is to anyone who has ever served, to see a loser drunkard idiot, mumbling fool of a parasite like Frederik with all those medals on his chest, it is the last little bubbling fart to show us the useless and more-decrepit-every-day Mary, ready to "sacrifice herself for Denmark" or some rotting garbage like that.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIjwsaduUjjMPEK-52sfG4xveLeUfp4KzHheGyiIIMEYV75J2maXHi5qFnzDwOI0XCuFPu8fYto1WsW0F91yP9mYdNbIBV46nyjtuXkp3xsOYleGwL7VYw7BNE5Wet9G6YLyowdjxwpg2f/s1600-h/2008011803.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIjwsaduUjjMPEK-52sfG4xveLeUfp4KzHheGyiIIMEYV75J2maXHi5qFnzDwOI0XCuFPu8fYto1WsW0F91yP9mYdNbIBV46nyjtuXkp3xsOYleGwL7VYw7BNE5Wet9G6YLyowdjxwpg2f/s320/2008011803.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159523294284072242" /></a><br />Because any stupid bitch who is more interested in pursing her lips to make her cheeks look smaller is NOT someone I want in a position to fire a gun. Can you imagine? "Hey you, you're not doing the T with your feet properly - BOOM!"<br /><br />And let's face it, this is all for posing, anyway. If Prince Harry of Wales, who wanted to badly to be deployed, wasn't because he was a security risk and a target because of what he is, we're never going to accept that Mary is ever going to be placed in any sub-atomic, minuscule moment of danger. The only danger Mary faces is her crumbling facade, and I don't mean just her face, because having trained her eyes to scan in different ways for cameras, she looks really, really freaky ;DUnknownnoreply@blogger.com6